It's nearly midnight and I'm soooo tired. I just got in from helping to supervise our school's grad.... in the USA, it would be called "The Prom." A fun time was had by all, but we all worry that our students will be safe at the after-parties.The last of my classes wrote their final exam this morning and the reports are due tomorrow morning, first thing! I marked like a fiend all afternoon and I'm only about 2/3 done, so I'll need to get up at 5:30 a.m. to finish them off.
For just over a week, I've been driving my son to his summer job, some 50 km (30 mi) away and then I head another 20 km to my school; reversed at the end of the day. He will be getting his driver's license in two weeks but until then, that will be our routine.
But it's well worth it because he is working at a skilled trade (construction), his future career. It's a rarity for a sixteen-year old to land a job that's not of the McJob variety. It pays much better and provides real experience will lead to other opportunities in the trades. And he loves the job! He gets himself up at 6:30 a.m. for work and nags me if I'm a minute late in driving him.
In other gay developments:
1. Ethan, the transgendered dude, had to cancel our coffee date on Monday evening as he was still tied up with a client but reschedule for Thursday. I'm not sure if I want to see him at all, actually.
He's the owner of a contacting business and has people working for him. Very impressive for a guy in his early 20s! We've texted a great deal recently (too much, in fact, as I don't have time); he's extremely chatty and tells me all about his father, his two siblings, their dogs, his childhood and on and on.
But he did tell me: "I don't know any guys I can hang out with." I think that's what he is hoping to find with me.
2. Big Red and I have seen each other several times recently but in a non-sexual way. Yesterday, he invited me out to lunch at a fast-food place so I picked him up from his workplace. He's very funny, smart and emotionally mature. But our meetings are bittersweet because I'm concerned that we are starting to really, really like each other... for me, the deal-breaker is that I will soon be 51 and he's 24!
3. I though I'd had my fill of hookups with married men..... they're too complicated to schedule and there's always the guilt of being the "Other Man." But I'm wavering with this slim, late 40s (!) dude (his actual picture shown below) who has wanted to hook up for some time. He's a shift worker so he's only available in mid-morning.... that works for me! I love his thighs!
Well, I remember those military haircuts that cost me two bits - unfortunately, not a single time did I get one from a naked dude. Damn!! lol.
ReplyDeleteUs married guys know it's tough to schedule with us and it cuts a lot of possibilities from our realm, but we so enjoy the time(s) we have with a buddy... As long as you aren't looking for a LTR, we're your guy! LOL.
I made that mistake once of thinking that a married guy (as he promised) would leave his wife for me. Never again will I think of a married guy in terms of an LTR.
DeleteOn the plus side, hookups with married guys (especially "straight" ones) are extremely intense.
In the US, the PTA and other parent groups get together and hold "after prom parties" with games, "casino night" where the youth can win prizes (decent ones like digital cameras, and stuff for college dorm rooms), good food (usually catered from 2 or 3 businesses) and sometimes a DJ. Most of the students would rather go there until 5AM rather than a drinking party, so safety is pretty much guaranteed. It's really cut down on the underaged drinking after prom!
ReplyDeleteJust out of curiosity, is there an LGBTQ youth group that puts on a prom for the LGBTQ youth? Ours was bloody awesome! I'll be chaperoning again next May.
You really ought to meet Ethan. Most transgendered people I've met (and I admit it isn't many) seem pretty lonely. They're just not comfortable around lots of people. If he's figured out you're not going to judge him, or act like he's weird, then you're exactly the kind of person to befriend him. Being trans is tough, I think much harder than gay or lesbian. People understand us, whether they accept us or not. People don't get trans. I honestly doubt sex is an issue with him. So what have you got to lose? You could make a new friend to hang out with, with no strings attached.
Our schools have been out for just over a week. That just meant my workload increased, too. Anyway, I'm sure you'll be happy to be finished with grading and all the other admin stuff that end-of-year entails!
Your son sounds like me when I got my first job - delivering morning newspapers. I learned real quick I had to get my own ass out of bed at 4:30AM! Good for your son!!! He sounds like he's been raised well.
I've rambled enough, that's what MY blog is for!
Peace <3
Jay
Jay, Thanks for your great comment!
Delete1. We don't have organized "safe grad after-parties here on such a wide scale. I have heard of individual parents (for example, with a cottage on a nearby lake) will host similar events for grad, confiscating the car keys of guests as they arrive. My daughter attended a large back yard after-party supervised by the parent / hosts where all the kids slept in tents!
2. We do not have the population to support a separate LGBTQ prom. It's hardly needed, anyway. In the public high school system, any "out" LGBTQ students with boyfriends or girlfriends would be welcome (and I think comfortable) attending the same Prom as everyone else.
There's a one or two gay or lesbian couples every year and it's no problem. The other students think it's cool, if anything.
3. Yes, I'm getting excited about meeting Ethan.
4. Yes, end-of-year generates a lot of work for teachers in a very short period of time: marking, reports, collecting texts, phoning home to parents, failure reports etc.
I have to prepare my final marks very carefully at the high end. I have many high-achieving (usually immigrant) students whose parents scrutinize the marks .... there's sometimes great controversy and a battle over who is in the 96 - 100% range!... and this is for grade 10!
Give it a go with Big Red - It may not work out but will give you experience in future relationships with men. It took me many attempts to find the right guy but don't regret the heartache at times i felt after breakups etc. Made me stronger and our relationship stronger
ReplyDeleteDon't let the age difference be the deal breaker, you are a bit too focused on that. If you click you click, if not...then not.
ReplyDeleteAnonymous: Yes, that is excellent advice about learning how to be with a relationship.
ReplyDeleteMy first and only relationship was with my ex-wife. I knew practically nothing about being in a relationship when we married and it made everything more difficult. But the main deal-breaker, of course, was the hidden fact that I was gay.
Sunne: Yes, I cannot shake the idea that he's 25 years younger than me. It's my former "straight" way of thinking about potential partners.
There is a very easy way to find out if he is a guy for more - try it ;)
DeleteNo seriously, if you feel comfortable with him, can be yourself and love the sex, what's wrong with it? Duhh...just saying, mature guys have married younger woman for centuries....not that I want to compare that but really, the most important thing is how you feel around him. If he makes you feel good, relaxed, happy and sexy - give it a try.
Late 40s Dude looks very presentable indeed. I generally prefer guys with more body hair but I'm also a thigh man, and those do indeed look inviting. As do other things. Is that his hook-up site picture or have you had the pleasure in person yet?
ReplyDeleteYes, married guys are generally very intense sexually. As for the guilt aspect (I think I may have written about this before but it bears repeating) if it isn't you, it will most surely be somebody else; and you, a sane, well-skilled, honorable man are far safer and better for them than a lot of the other guys out there who could get them into real difficulties.