Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Muscular thighs wrapped around my head

Last night, I gave another blowjob to the hunky 35 year old married guy.  Again, he left his wife and kiddies late at night for a 25 minute drive along the highway.  To paraphrase Sally Field, "He must like me, he really must like me!!!"  ... (kidding, I'm not that needy)

This time, we didn't speak at all but it was my hottest blowjob experience ever.   I loved it when he moaned and caught his breath as I worked my magic .... several times, a sharp tremour went through his whole body.  Damn, I'm good!

I deep-throated him, pressing my mouth hard into his pubis so his cockhead rammed into the back of my throat.  Then suddenly, he wrapped his muscular thighs around my head in a death grip, and hooked his legs around my back, pressing me harder into his groin.  At the same time, he thrust is groin upwards rapidly and repeatedly, hard.... thrust, thrust, thrust... shoving his cock deeper into my mouth.   Sooooo hot!!!

It was a move that I'd never seen before, certainly not in person, but not even in years of watching online porn. I LOVE it when guys get aggressive during sex.... it matches my aggressiveness.

But there's no time for a longer blog post.  I will be picking up a beautiful 22 year old in a moment for some some M2M fun.  (Note:  that makes FIVE 22 year old men I've hooked up with so far this year .... )

I gave him his first M2M experience last summer and he's been pestering me for more.  I've cancelled out on him twice before so I dare not do it again.

That's an actual pic of him, below.  He sent it today to entice me into having sex with him... as though that was even needed.  .He is the nicest, most masculine guy ever, horny as hell, with a magnificent fat cock ..... sheer perfection!

Monday, October 29, 2012

Giving pleasure to men

All pics from
Since I had the hot blowjob session with the 35 year old  married guy (his profile name is BigHammer!) he's messaged me twice requesting round two.  Sadly, the timing wasn't right for us to hook up.

Some online friends have recently expressed the opinion that I am short-changing myself regarding gay sex;  that nearly all of my recent hookups have involved me giving pleasure to the some inexperienced young man.  I'll admit, I've only had one or two really great blowjobs and I've never cum the few times I bottomed or topped.   I know that I really need to find a really experienced versatile guy who can show me the ins and outs of anal sex.

While I would prefer some reciprocation eventually, right now, this is what works for me.  I live about 20 minutes out of town so most hookups can't '/ won't drive to where I am.  My son seems to be living here most of the time now:  hosting is difficult.   We are working non-stop, all weekend and after work on weekdays to prepare for this, my first winter in my new house.   All of this combined with my demanding day job means that I'm too tired for anything too adventurous.

 So, if BigHammer wants to drive out to experience my oral skills, I say, "My mouth is all yours, horny guy!"  At this stage of my gay sexual education, my goal is to devote my life to learning how to pleasure a man.  Practice!  Practice!  Practice!  I especially  love practicing my blowjob skills on such a muscular guy with big, beefy thighs.

--------------------------------------------How about if I finish off Sean's TMI Thursday's questions which I started on the last post?

#5:    The number of careers you've had.  Best?  Worst?
I did all the usual grass-cutting and painting jobs starting as a very young child.... this is pretty much demanded of kids in an immigrant family.   I spent several summers working as a hospital laundry boy.  I collected and washed five tons per day (dry weight) of shitty, pissy, pukey and bloody laundry.   I loved this job for it's warm and colleagial working environment. 

I then worked as a professional engineer in the chemical manufacturing industry for nearly eight years.  In the end, I grew to hate it because of the brutality with which the companies treated their non-union staff.  I spent much of the latter part of my engineering career looking for an escape.

Now as a high school teacher, I love every moment I spent in class with my.  I am so lucky!  It is so much fun working with young people and I have a strong sense that I am making a difference in others' lives.   I have the highest possible level of job satisfaction!   :-)

#6:  The number of operations you've had.  Lots! 
  • At five, I had an operation to lower an undescented testicle.  They didn't find it, so that's why have a uni-ball which works just fine, thank you very much. 
  • At 12 and again at 14, I broke my thumb skiing and cycling, respectively.  Each time, I had general anesthetic to set the break because each break included a disclocation.  The second incident had to be set with pins because my thumb was broken in two places. 
  • At 19, I had a massive involvement of a malignant melanoma which had metasized widely.  I had several lengthy and invasive radical surgeries;  first with the original cancer and months later when I had a couple of recurrences which required even more invasive surgery.
#7:  The number of significant others you've been in love with.
Even though I was gay and didn't know it, I truly believed I loved my wife for much of our marriage.  Even now, I feel a strong affection for her (when she is a vulnerable state and not angry) and a strong hope that things will work out for her.

I was heavily involved with my Special Guy, a married man, for four months early this year when I was at my most vulnerable.  (I haven't yet blogged about him... my feelings are still too raw)  I did believe that I loved him ... or at least the part of him that he allowed me to see.   Or maybe I was just "in lust" with him.   I really don't know.

Saturday, October 27, 2012

Too Much Information

I missed Jeep Guy's TMI Thursday this week, so here it is!  This one is rather long so for now, I'm doing just half of it.  The pics from Awkward Family Photos are a nod to Sean's Dogably Pawfect Saturday....


1.  The number of homes you've lived in.   I lived in my parents' home from birth until I was 22.  At 27, I built (personally, with my family) a rather grand home on an 'executive-sized' suburban lot in which we raised our family for 22 years.   As part of my divorce, we sold our marital home last April and I acquired my present spectacular waterfront property. 

From the ages of 22 - 27, I rented five or six different houses, apartments and rooms as my career took me from Quebec, Ontario, Newfoundland and British Columbia.   I liked every place in which lived but for me, owning my own home was of primary importance.

2.  The number of cars that you've had.   I have no interest in cars other than to get me from "A" to "B" and will never buy a new car, ever in my life.   I tend to buy cars which are two to six years old and drive them until they are around fourteen years old. 

The cars I've had include:
-early 80s Ford pickup truck.  Loved it!  The vehicle of my youth!
-late 80s Dodge Colt  (Mitsubishi).   Drove it in major cities all over Canada.... My favourite ever car.
-mid 80s Ford Tempo.   Biggest pile of ka-ka ever built.
-early 90s Mercury Sable wagon.  Boring "okay" familly car, great for carrying loads of kids.  I drove it until the frame rusted through and it collapsed on the highway....
-late 90s Chevy Astro Van.   Fond memories of this reliable gas guzzler as we used it for driving trips all over the continent.
-six year old Toyota Corolla.  My present car.  I like it!  I am now 'sold' on Toyotas, but a full-sized pickup truck would be a better fit for my rural lifestyle if it weren't for the terrible gas mileage.

3.  Approximate number of sexual encounters you've had.  
My wife is the first and only woman I had sex with |(I was a virgin well into my 20s.)    We had a lot of it in the early days of our marriage but it dwindled off to no sex at all within five years.... for reasons we now all know, but I didn't figure out until ten years later.  I was gay!

Since January 2012 when I signed up on, I've hooked up around once a week... maybe a little bit less, if you count casual encounters such as back seat blowjobs.  I could hook up every day as I still seem to be very popular with desirable guys of all ages, but job and family demands and hosting problems limit my availability.

4.  Number of siblings you have.   I have one older brother.  Although I'm the youngest in the family, my role was that of the "older, responsible, first-born child" because my brother had his problems and dramas growing up.  Most parental attention was (and still is) focussed on him. 

My wife used to get enraged by the way my parents treated me as compared to my brother but I always told her, "It has made a stronger, more independent person."


Thursday, October 25, 2012

Sucking some straight cock (NSFW)

These pics from all resemble the beefy guy in this story.  Woo-hoo!

I frequently receive messages on from "straight" married guys asking for a blowjob.  Many are guys are in their 50s " with a few extra pounds" listed on their profiles.  In my experience, a "few extra" translates into at least forty pounds.   I respond politely and tell them that I steer clear of married guys.  That is more-or-less true, but truth be told, I don't like giving blowjobs with a huge belly hanging down in my face.

But my "rule" against hooking up with married guys flies out the window when he is in his sexual prime (mid 30s) and describes himself as "athletic", "handsome", "virile" and having a "thick, long, uncut cock."  But these youngish married guys are much harder to get into bed than the horny 22 year olds or the less-sought-after older men.

Invariably, these young married guys send me flirtatious, sexy messages until the time comes to actually make a hookup arrangement.  They`re paranoid about discretion so they invariably stop communicating or even delete their pof profiles entirely!

So I was delighted last night when I got a message from a former (minor league) hockey player, 35, big cocked, athletic, married with young children and horny as hell.  He had flirted with me last summer but under a different profile name which he had since deleted:

Horny 35 year old:     Are you free tonite?
Buddy Bear:               Yes, what do you have in mind.
So I'm a very clean big cocked married man
I'm free now tell about 10 or so
I'm very horny today
I'm all showered and my big balls are nicely shaved
I have a big hot load ready for you
BB:   (note:  this is my standard 'sales pitch.')                     
A blowjob is my favourite thing to do especially on a masculine straight guy. I'm very good at it!  I'd love to have your throbbing cock in my mouth, emptying it's load..... LOVE IT!  Cock worship!!
Horny:       l'll cum out there.  I want this now.

Within the hour, Horny had driven over 30 minutes through a driving rain to meet me at my friend's vacant cottage nearby.  (I keep an eye on the place during winter as my friends live far away.)  I couldn't host at home because my son was there.

He was a fine specimen of manhood, 6'-4", muscled (but carrying some extra weight since his hockey-playing days), goateed and lightly furry.  So masculine....  and SO nervous!

The cottage was freezing cold, so I turned on the natural gas fireplace and lit a few candles.  He stripped completely naked and we got down to business on some cushions in front of the fireplace.

He was a newbie, I'm sure, so I explained that every man I ever sucked had a different sexual response.  I needed some direction from him so he could get the most pleasure possible.

It turned out to be the hottest blowjob I ever gave!  Married men always seem to be so into it, just insatiable!  All that pent-up sexual energy!!.....  He was very verbal, moaning and talking slutty, at times sounding like a bad porn flick but I knew it was genuine, "Ya...oh yea, baby!   Suck it!... make love to my cock!!... oooo... oh, yea...  Slow down, you want to enjoy it, make it last..... yea.   You want this, don't ya?  Tell me how much you want my cock!!"

I stuck my lubed finger up his rear end and gave him a prostate massage.... he really liked that... "Oh yea... do it!   Lick my ass!"  and then asked me to rim him.  When I gave him an aggressive rim job, he started moaning like a banshee!  He was so into it,  I wondered, "Do straight guys enjoy being rimmed this much?"

Just as he was about to cum, he grabbed onto my hair with both beefy hands and stopped the motion of my head.  I deep throated his cock as it throbbed and throbbed.... and with my finger, I felt his asshole clenching and prostate throbbing....  Normally, I don't allow a guy to grab onto my head during a blowjob but he was gentle.  It was extremely hot with him controlling the action like that.

I spit into my  cum rag and wiped lube and cum off his cock and he did wiped it again.  (concealing the evidence!)    He seemed in a daze as literally sprinted towards the door.

I wonder if I'll see him again?   I felt sorry for him a bit, a youngish married guy with children who was just starting down a very slippery slope.....

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Suicides at my school

The world has been following the story of Amanda Todd, the British Columbia teenagers who committed suicide two weeks ago after years of cyberbullying. 

Two students connected with our school committed suicide this weekend.   One, a grade 9 girl, is a current student and there's been much speculation that her suicide was a 'copycat' situation.   The other suicide was a young man, aged 20, who graduated two years ago and in fact, had been my student.   Our school goes through a student suicide every two or three years or so, so this frequency is quite unusual. 

Since coming out and becoming extremely 'gay-aware', I now consider the possibility that any young person who commits suicide could have been questioning his / her sexuality.   LGBTQ youth have a much higher incidence of suicide and depression than their straight counterparts.  Reliable data on this isn't available but some sources suggest that suicide rates among gay youth could be eight times greater than in the straight population.  

About five years ago, I had a stereotypical `jock` - type student in my class for grades 11 and 12:  handsome, hyper-masculine, star quarterback, city champion wrestler with a cheerleader girlfriend.    But he was quite vocal about his homophobia, a rarity amongst senior students here.  I would even hear whispered homophobic remarks (I suspect) directed at me during class. 

I constantly wondered about his sexuality .... it was very much a `He doth protest too much, methinks` situation.   He graduated,  spent a year at university far from home, returned home for Spring Break and hung himself in his parents` home.   I remain absolutely convinced that he had discovered he was gay and couldn`t deal with the pressures of that:  from his family, society and most importantly, from himseslf.

Several of my teacher-collegues believe, based on long experience, that is the young men enrolled in the lower-rung classes* who suffer the most upon realizing that they are gay.   They are absolutely devastated by this self-realization and are often the most successful at commmiting suicide;  we live in a prime moose-hunting area and rifles are in abundance.

*variously called basic level, remedial, applied or tech-stream.

For a young man discovering that he is gay, his expectations of societal norms such dating a girl, sticking his cock into a vagina, marrying and having children are all shot to hell.  He might not be smart or experienced enough to realize that he could have a rich and full life as a gay man, partly because there are no gay role models in his life.  Presently, there are no gay teachers at my school who are out to their students.

This is the main reason that I want to be out to my students as soon as possible.   I'd be the coolest, most charismatic, most confident gay role for all our students, questioning, straight or LGBTQ.  The fact that I was married and had children before coming out would only be a positive, rerinforcing the fact that our sexuality is complex and for some, not easily understood.

And yet.... I'm holding back for now.  My son is in grade 11 at my school and many of his friends are my students.  Until my divorce is safely finalized and I know for sure that he will be okay, I won't officially come out to my students, although many of them, I think, already know.

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Bottoms seeking a top
Here are a few hot men / cute doggie pics for Sean's Dogably Pawfect Saturday

I am very lucky that my children are with me nearly all the time .... but my slut phase is really starting to suffer.   I think they're avoiding my wife's house because she's so grouchy and bossy all the time.   After just five days at my wife's house, my son came here for the weekend but told me a moment ago that he's staying for two weeks!  

It's awkward constantly telling guys "No, I can't host."   You have to be logged onto POF a lot of the time to get offers from the horny young men cruising the site for sex.  It's amazing how quickly the offers dry up if you're not doing this.

Back seat blowjobs have lost their appeal for me (for now), mainly because winter is fast approaching and the evenings are getting very cold.  Also, there is only so far I am willing to go in a back seat.  Imagine this headline in our local rag, "Teacher Caught With Pants Down at Cruising Spot!"   I'd much rather kiss and cuddle some sweet guy guy under the covers of my own warm bed. 

I think the largest group of guys I've turned down recently have been bottoms seeking a top.  I don't know what the statistics are on this but it is my impression that there are whole lot of bottoms seeking tops.  I'm not very confident about topping yet and I won't do anal sex with some guy I've never met.  At least, that's what I'm telling myself right now.

On several different occasions recently, I did consider topping a stranger as they seemed quite articulate and intelligent after a lengthy chat.  But then after I had semi-agreed to be their top, these conversations took a weird turn, at least for me.

Conversation #1:
Bottom 1:   Do you mind if my friend is in the house?
Buddy Bear:   Why?
Bottom 1:   He wants to watch you fucking me.
BB:   No, sorry, that's not happening.
Bottom 1:   What about if I fuck you and he watches us?
BB:   Not interested....

Conversation #2:
Bottom 2:    Are you into insertions?
Buddy Bear:   What does that mean?
Bottom 2:    A golf ball, a huge dildo.
BB:   And you want me to stick them up your ass?  No, I'm not into that, not at all.
Bottom 2:   How about water squirting?   Fisting?
BB:   I'm REALLY, REALLY not into that.  I strongly suggest you set up a profile on  There are lots of guys there who are into that sort of thing.
Bottom:  Hey, thanks, dude!

What I'd like to find is an experienced versatile fuck buddy who can host and with whom I can practice my anal skills.   What I don't want, however, is a guy who's "marriage material", someone who will want to start a relationship with me or, worse set, someone who I will become emotionally attached to.  I'm just not ready for that;   it's too soon!

Been there, done that, for both of these things.  

Friday, October 19, 2012

A lesbian mom in her slut phase

I did NOT take these pics!  From:
Last night was Parents' Night at my school and I had the pleasure of meeting with numerous hot Dads looking like the guys pictured here. Woo-hoo!   Lots of burly, hairy, masculine men.

I'm always pleasantly surprised that these straight men wear such tight jeans. Distracting!  Especially when they're sitting in front of me with their thighs spread wide open! Sadly, all the sexy Dads brought their tubby, lumpy little wives along.

Ours is quite a small town and I fully expect that one day, a couple will arrive for a Parents' Night interview and the husband will turn out to be a guy who I've hooked up with. Awkward!!

A commenter on my last post was concerned that I was planning to host random hook-up guys in my home while my kids were home.  (I won't be)

But coincidentally, this subject came up in class last week.  One of my grade ten students is always very tired and invariably falls asleep with his head on his desk.  I asked him during class: "Why are you so tired all the time?  Are you up all night doing online computer games?"   This is a very common problem amongst the young men in our classes.

He was indignant: "NO!  My parents, they're divorced .... .right?   And my mom's a lesbian... okay?  I don't care that she's a lesbian.... great!   But that's not the problem.

But she brings these women home.... but does she have to bring home a different one EVERY NIGHT??   Last night she brought some chick home from her hockey team and they were going at it all night long!   THEY DIDN'T STOP FOR EIGHT HOURS!!   I had my pillow over my head but I didn't sleep at all!!!

A few observations:
  1. He wasn't troubled in the slightest by the fact that his mother came out as gay.

  2. This whole exchange occurred with an entire class of 15 - 16 year olds listening in.   There were no smirks or whispered conversations.  No one else seemed to think it was a big deal.  Ours is a fairly remote, blue-collar town but this speaks to the high degree of acceptance of LGBTQ people amongst the young people in Canada.  It just isn't a big deal.

  3. As a newly-out gay guy leaving an unhappy marriage, I fully understand that this parent is wallowing in her slut phase and I sympathized with her situation.   I'd be  hooking up with many more guys if it wasn't for my hosting difficulties.

  4. As a teacher, it isn't my job to comment on a parent's sex life.... in fact, that would be highly awkward and unprofessional.

  5. But it is my job to ensure the student is successful as possible in his academic work. 

So.... I by-passed the school administration and spoke directly to the school social worker;  a fantastic woman who works tirelessly on behalf of our troubled students, LGBTQ and otherwise.   She agreed that this was an academic problem and scheduled a meeting with the student. 

I heard through the grapevine that the mom also was called into a meeting later in the week;   I'm fairly sure that the student's problem in getting enough sleep will be resolved quickly.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Home Alone

With reference to my previous post, here are some tips for the bathhouse newbie.  (note:  it's from a barebacking site, a practice which I'm NOT in favour of)

Except for a handful of nights,  most of my kids have been living with me continuously for the past six months.  With the start of the new school year, they had set up a schedule alternating weeks between their parents' houses.   But they haven't been sticking to the schedule, deciding to spend extra weekends or even weeks with me often on short notice.  It broke my heart to cancel a planned sleep-over recently with Hunky 22-year-old when my daughter phoned to say she was staying with me an extra week.

Hosting has become nearly impossible.  In the past week alone, I've cancelled hookup opportunities from at eight appealing guys, all younger than me with four in their early twenties.   Most of these guys had hooked up with me in the summer.... I'm always happy to know that I have satisifed customers wanting more!

Last night, my daughter spent the night at a friend's house and I was home alone.  I had planned to spend some sweet, naked time in my own bed with some sexy young man:  cuddling, kissing and sucking cock.   But I was very tired and had a lot of work to prepare for Parent-Teacher interviews this week.   So I spent the night alone and didn't even log onto to avoid having to explain to some appealing guy why I didn't want to hook up with him right then.  If you say "no" too many times to a guy online, he will quickly stop asking.

But I should be careful what I wish for.  Soon, my kids will all be living on their own and I will be here in my 'empty nest.'   One of the greatest fears of closeted married men is that they will lose contact with their children if they come out.  That certainly hasn't happened to me!

Although the kids love their mother, they find her difficult to live with.  They complain to me about her being bossy, angry, lazy and disorganized, with an attitude of "I'm right all the time" and "It's my way or the highway."   I refuse to be drawn into these complaints but I do point out to them that I lived under those conditions for twenty years.

By contrast, I'm a "cool dad" who is infinitely more relaxed about everything ( perhaps too relaxed.)   As well, the kids' real emotional attachment is to my spectacular waterfront property with endless recreational opportunities rather than my wife's little house in town.   So... I shouldn't be surprised that they prefer to spend time with me.

Eventually, I will talk to the kids about my desire to entertain men in my own home.... and I know they will be okay with it.  But that must wait until our divorce is finalized because (1) my wife will hear about my hookups and (2) she will have a very hard time with it;  it may prompt her to attempt change the terms of our agreement and increase her demands.  

I just don't want to open that can of worms!

Monday, October 15, 2012

Bathhouse Etiquette: advice needed! (NSFW)

I 've had much success at hooking up with guys online.   I feel I'm an expert in negotating that fine line between indicating interest and sounding over-eager and how to flirt in a sexually - explicit manner without creeping out your prey.   I am also very confident when flirting with the beautiful stripper boys in the clubs.

But bathhouse etiquette leaves me mystified.  Dear readers who know this scene, please offer your opinion on these weighty matters:
  • Why is there no talking?  Would be a huge mistake to talk to another guy in the bathhouse hallway?
  • Is all communication done through eye contact or body language?
  • How can you communicate sexual preferences / desires without talking?
  • When naked guy brushes his shoulder against you deliberately in the hallway, is that an invitation?  What is the proper response? 
  • Does an open cubicle door always mean, "come on in!".... for sex or to watch?
  • Also, in the privacy of the cubicle, is talking allowed? 
  • If a guy is giving you "the eye", how does one tell when it's time to initiate physical contact?
My last post left off with me at the Steamworks bathhouse at 2:00 am.   At this point, I'd been up for over twenty hours and was sooooo tired!  Up at 6:00 am, I had a demanding day at school, followed by an extremely long plane ride and then several pleasant hours (and several drinks) at Remington's strip club.

I was only there to sleep and to also test my comfort level following my first, overwhelming visit there.   At that late mid-week hour, Steamworks was quiet but there were still a dozen or so men roaming the darkened halls.  ALL were amazing physical specimens;  for the first time in my slut phase, I felt a bit dumpy and middle-aged.  Many of the men were in their early 20s, probably boys from nearby Ryerson University.

Another first:  walking by an open door, I saw a muscled man strapped in a sling rocking back and forth in anal sex with a standing-up hunk.  Ewwww!!!  I had to avert my eyes.   I noticed several of the frat boys were walking around and around the hallways;  they seemed even more unsure of how to proceed that me.

This time, I felt extremely comfortable since I knew what to expect.   I soaked in the hot tub with five other men.... beautiful eye-candy but no conversation or hanky-panky going on, had a shower and went to sleep in my cubicle.  I brought industrial-style ear muffs to wear, so I slept like a log until 8:30 am.

In the morning, I was well-rested but felt sick to my stomach with anxiety.   My appointment to find out my biopsy results was in two hours... (and as I said in my last post, the results were negative!)

The shower room had four glass walls so as I showered, several guys instantly appeared on the other side of the glass, apparently to watch ..... and one hunk with a perfect body joined me.  It would have been hot lathering him up  (and I think he was hoping for some action), but I was NOT in the mood for anything.  I quickly dressed and headed off for the Prostate Centre.

Saturday, October 13, 2012

Dogably Pawfect Saturday

Here are some more hot men / cute dog pictures for Sean's Dogably Pawfect Saturday.

I arrived in Toronto at 10:00 pm last Wednesday night and went directly to Remington's .... by far my favourite Toronto hangout.   What I like best about Remington's is that the dancers go onstage looking like dozens of young men you see on the street every day:  jeans, running shoes, T-shirts.  And then they peel off their clothes to reveal their flawless bodies and beautiful cocks.... hot!!!

It was a slow night so I got lots of attention from the shirtless stripper boys between their acts, which I love.  Yes, I know they're hustling for lap dances and I tell them right away that I'm not paying for one.  But many of them stay anyway, to chat. flirt and get all touchy-feely with me.... hugging, fondling, whispering in my ear.  So sweet....

That is my cue to flirt right back (and I'm very good at it!) and get touchy-feely with them.  After all, I gave them fair warning that I would NOT be paying for it.  

One sweet Arabic-looking dancer was the most perfect specimen of manhood I'd ever seen... beautiful face, dark skin, flawless body shape, lightly muscled and lovely cock.  He returned several times to chat and to kiss my neck, rub his hands over my inner thighs and bulge... he was an incorrigible flirt, the best I'd ever encountered.   And I matched his flirting, move-for-move and even cupped his bubble butt (with my hands under his jeans) to increase the pressure as he ground his rock-hard cock into mine.  So hot!!!   I nearly wavered on my "no lapdance" rule but in fact, I had no money with me.

He said that I reminded him of Bruce Willis.  I said, "Hmmm.... I look nothing like Bruce Willis."   He said, "It's not what you look like ...."  He struggled to explain himself.  "It's in your're just bad!   Up to no good!!"   I'd agree with that.... I'm often full of mischief but I was feeling extra incorrigible, probably fuelled by the two large draft beer (rather than my usual one) and a free vodka shot which the bartender passed out to all the (five) customers.

I was delighted when, after his third dance of the evening,  Arabic Hottie stepped off the stage and went directly to where I was sitting.  We fondled each other while he poured out his story: from a conservative Muslim immigrant family, closeted (his parents would prefer him dead than gay, he said), working his way through university.)   I could offer little advice to him but to suggest he become financially independent as soon as possible and then proceed with an "out" life with or without their approval.

At closing time, 2:00 am, I gave Arabic Hottie a hug and wished him the best in his life and staggered up the street to the Steamworks bathhouse where I stayed until about 9:00 am.   More about Steamworks in my next post.

Thursday, October 11, 2012

In Toronto again....

UPDATE:   Good news!  There were no cancer cells in the 14 biopsy samples taken. Whew!  I dodged that bullet, for now anyway. 

I say "for now" because the news wasn't all good.  The ultrasound and needle biopsy showed high grade prostatic intraepithelial_neoplasia  in a few locations on my prostate.  This is essentially a abnormality of prostate tissue and believed to precede the development of prostate cancer.  Details to follow. 

After my appointment, I met with Jeffrey for coffee in The Village;  an extremely enjoyable way to spend two hours... lots of fantastic conversation!  Now I'm off on (budget) Toronto shopping spree.  Value Village and Salvation Army Thrift Shop, here I come! 

Then it's off to have dinner with my wife's brother and family who have so kind and generous to their gay ex-brother-in-law.  My flight arrives in my hometown at 1:15 a.m. and I'll be in my own bed at 2:00 am. Woo-hoo!

This is a timed post which was written yesterday.   Right now (Thursday a.m.) I am leaving for The Prostate Centre to find out the results of my needle biopsy three weeks ago.

I could pretend to be all perky and optimistic, but the reality is that I feel sick to my stomach with dread at the prospect of having cancer again.  I'll keep you posted!

In the meantime, here are some beautiful men from and Sean's latest batch of TMI questions.

1.   Dogs are  ..... unconditional love.
2.   My boyfriend is ..... in my future, I hope, a sweet, sexy, loving man who likes to cuddle.
3.   I love ...... being in my own home surrounded by the people I love.
4.   I hate ...... intolerant, closed-minded conservative religious bigots.
5.   I am ...... happier than I've been in many years.
Sex is ...... essential to a healthy, happy relationship.

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Much to be thankful for....

Today's pics came from   This is by far my favourite look on a man;  a bit of scruffiness or a nicely-trimmed goatee.  HOT!  I rocked that look for many years but in the last several months, I've been forced into a clean-shaven look.  

During my hookups with all those delicious 21 - 24 year old men, many have told me that my stubble hurts.... such sensitive skin, poor boys!   So if I want to kiss these beautiful, horny young men, the stubble has got to go ..... a small price to pay!

In my last post marking Canadian Thanksgiving, I didn't say what I am thankful for, in order of importance to me ....

  1. Being alive and pain-free, despite the various health problems which are creeping up on me.

  2. Having three beautiful, talented, supportive, compassionate children who sailed through their teenage years with no problems at all.   Since coming out to them 18 months ago, my kids and I are closer than ever.... for that, I will be eternally grateful.

  3. The Canadian health care system.  I am increasingly apprehensive about my October 11th visit to Toronto to find out if I have prostate cancer.  But it is a huge comfort to know that I'm receiving the best care in the world and that I don't have to sell my home to get it.

  4. Being an out-and-proud gay man, determined to wave the rainbow flag and to provide as much support as possible to my LGBTQ brothers and sisters.... I think I make an amazing gay role model!

  5. No longer having to live with my wife;   I was desperately unhappy for many years, living with a person who was angry, critical, erratic, depressed and in conflict all the  time.  

  6. Having a never-ending supply of beautiful young men who are willing, eager in fact, to lie down naked with me. Whether it is simply cuddling together, kissing or more, this intimacy brings me the greatest joy and contentment.  

  7. My beautiful new home.... it's a very special place and it is all mine, mine, mine.  I no longer have to do battle with my wife over where we keep the cutlery or the cling wrap.  My property is one of the most spectacular on a coastline which is geographically-unique in the entire world.  Every single day, I marvel at my good fortune, especially when I consider others who live in squalor or indeed, big city folks who spend a fortune on tiny condos with a view of the building next door.

  8. Having survived my divorce which is in its final stages .... I'm financially secure (more or less), happier and more confident than I've been in decades.   

  9. My Canadian citizenship:   every day, I read accounts from the USA of intolerance, racism, bigotry or just plain craziness directed towards LGBTQ folks or people with a different skin colour or religion.  Canada seems like such a saner, safer, gentler place.

Sunday, October 7, 2012

Canadian Thanksgiving

Today's beautiful pictures are from Marlen Boro, a photographer who specializes in "male boudoir " photography.  More on him in another post. 

I had a fantastic Thanksgiving dinner yesterday with my oldest and youngest kids, our first in my new home in its specacular waterfront setting.   There were no other human guests but we were joined by four dogs with a wide range of sizes, ages, temperments and abilities to get along with each other. 

Each of us has our own dog and we were also dog-sitting my soon-to-be-ex wife's dog for a total of four.   My wife is spending Thanksgiving with relatives far away and our middle daughter is joining her there.

For dinner:
Roasted free-range chickens, raised by my new gay friends.
     -one stuffed with bread cubes, onions and fresh thyme, parsley, sage and rosemary
     -one stuffed with wild rice, brown rice and mushrooms
 Squash baked with butter and maple syrup  (so Canadian!)
 Home-made bread, straight from the oven
 Mashed potatoes & gravy ... home-made from scratch.  No rubbish!

For dessert, three banana cream pies:
    -an old family favourite with home-made pastry cream, whipping cream and vanilla
    -a newly-invented banana-chocolate variation
    -an insanely delicious variation made with bananas carmelized in brown sugar and butter... *

* I followed this recipe except used plain gelatine and four whole rather than eight egg yolks in the pastry cream.

On Monday, we're going to my parents' family Thanksgiving dinner.  This is always a treat because the food is fantastic; Thanksgiving turkey and all the trimmings combined with traditional foods from our ethnic group.  Best of all, I don't have to cook!

I also enjoying helping myself to my father's liquor cabinet.   But this has to be done "in secret" because he offers a drink (one!) only once each year, at Christmas.  My parents would worry that I was becoming a closet alcoholic if they knew I drank alcohol at Thanksgiving!   In mid-afternoon, yet!

I have so much to be thankful for but the list is too long to just tack onto the end of this post.  My family has come such a long way since my Thanksgiving 2011 post, especially me!  I will do a "things I am thankful for" post in two days.   

Friday, October 5, 2012

"I'll hold my butt cheeks open for you" (NSFW)

In my front yard:  too chilly for a bare-assed picture today!
Winter is fast approaching and there has been snowfall in the region but not right where I live.  That's me standing in my front yard watching the ocean being tossed about by fierce winds.  It's FREEZING out!!!  

We have much to do to get the house ready before winter starts in earnest.  For example, I had to dig up the entire line to the well which now needs to be heat-traced, insulated and covered up ASAP.

To that end, I'm trying not to spend too much time on   It's awkward getting hookup offers every time I log on from decent guys and having to explain why you're turning them down.  I don't want to drive them away completely.  "Can I get a raincheck on that?"

The view from my front yard, looking in the other direction.
Perfect Physical Specimen continues to message me daily.  He's constantly frustrated that he's having no success with girls his age.... hmmm.... could that be because he likes guys?   I told him that girls his age always go for someone older.  "Why don't you try a woman in her mid-30s, preferably divorced?"  They'd LOVE to show a sweet, handsome young man like you some new tricks."   So he's going to try it......

Here's part of our conversation last night: 

Perfect Physical Specimen:   "will I see u sometime?"
Buddy Bear:  "Sure... some time."   (I'm playing hard to get)
PPS:  "next time could you stick your tongue up my ass as far as you can?"
BB:  "I'll try but it's hard!   You have such a nice rounded bum... it's hard to get my face in that close!"   (he has a lovely bubble butt)
PPS:  "I'll hold my butt cheeks open for you"
BB:  "Perfect!"
PPS:   "you can kiss me if you want."
BB:   "That's okay.  We don't have to.  I know straight guys like you don't like kissing guys."
PPS:   "I would do it for you.  Im just being a nice guy."

Too funny!


In divorce news this week, my wife and I finalized the changes and corrections to our draft Separation Agreement which I then delivered to our lawyer-mediator.   When the final document is produced, we will both go in to sign it together.   Then, I will file for a joint uncontested divorce.  Woo-hoo!

True to form, my wife tried to renege on the clause which allows a reduction in spousal support payments to her if my income were to be reduced due to illness or disability.   Meaning, even if I was on a long-term disability pension because of my spinal problem, for example, she would still receive full spousal support.

I was so pissed off at her!   I reminded her that spousal support was meant to equalize our incomes.  It's purpose was not for her to take everything there was to take. This was a rare face-to-face conversation;  I snarled at her and then walked away in disgust.

The next day, she emailed to say that the spousal separation agreement could remain unchanged.  In the end, we ended up with a very fair agreement.   Our various lawyers all agreed that we did well.  They said it is rare for a divorcing couple to achieve such a high level of agreement so quickly

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

So many men.... so little time (and energy)
Monday and Tuesday are always my busiest nights on for hookup opportunitites (but why?) and last night was no exception. 

My son was to start a two-week stay at my wife's house yesterday so I had arranged for Hunky 22 year-old to spend some sweet time with me, in my own bed.  Woo-hoo!  Of all the guys I've been with, he's permanently at the head of the line.  And it's not just his beautiful body and big cock which are the appeal;  he's smart, funny, interesting and sexually adventurous. 

But then we found out that my wife would be out of town and my son would be with me for another week.  With enormous regret, I cancelled Hunky but was able to say "yes" to a hookup with a beautiful 36 year-old guy from India whose wife and kids live in another city.  He's smart, funny and passionate;  a fantastic kisser and  cuddler who I'd hooked up with in the spring. 

But after an extremely busy day at school, I was soooooo tired, I couldn't face a 30 minute drive back into town, so I messaged Beautiful Indian dude to cancel. 

In the meantime, I was messaged on POF for a hookup by  Perfect Physical Specimen, horny as always, and by two other appealing guys who'd been chatting with me for some weeks, a 32 year old single guy and 47 year old married guy.   Since none of us could host, I turned them all down. 
Later in the evening, I had another offer from a 44 year old married guy seeking his second-ever hookup with a man at his own house;  his wife was out of town on business.  He's having sex with men in his wife's bed? .... forget that idea!

By 9:00 pm, I was no longer tired when a 21 year-old student POF-messaged me:  "Can I suck your cock?"  Ka-ching!   I messaged back, "I'd like to suck YOUR cock!  But is the back seat of my car okay? I can pick you up in 30 minutes!"   He agreed and off I went!

At our meeting spot, a slim, handsome young man with ginger-coloured, shaggy hair jumped into my car.  Irresistible!  And punctual!  We sped off seeking a private place to park.

Handsome Student: "Do you have anything?"  
Buddy Bear:  "What?  Do you mean diseases?
HS:   "Yes!"
BB:  "Well, other than the green pus dripping out of my cock, I'm fine!  I'M KIDDING!!  THAT WAS JUST A JOKE!!!"  `... well I thought it was funny...

He was an engineering student, very intelligent and articulate, and he asked me about my former career as an engineer and about some classes he was having difficulty with.   Hey, maybe I could offer him tutoring in exchange for sexual favours!

We found a very dark parking lot in a safe neighbourhood.  At my request, I unzipped him and took off his tight jeans.  OFMG!   Yet another big, beautiful, fat uncut cock ... mouth-watering!   Is it something in the water?  Do all these boys have fat cocks?

It was the usual sweet blowjob experience for me; plenty of meat to play with, ample foreskin and enough length to ram the back of my throat.  He was not vocal but I could judge how it was going by his change in breathing.   Unlike some young guys who cum very quickly, he went on and on and on. 

Finally, he pumped his load into into my mouth... I so love a hot, throbbing cock!!  I held his twitching cock in my mouth for a long time afterwards, caressing the shaft gently with my tongue.  I spit into my cum rag  (take note, Jack!) and took his cock back into my mouth and applied gentle pressure.

He zipped up:  "That was awesome!   Now it's your turn!"  Whoops!  I had to tell him about my needle biopsy and that I couldn't get a blowjob just yet.   He said:  "Well, I'll just have to give you a blow job the next time we're together!"  Sweet!

He was highly sympathetic and asked me about the procedure and my prognosis.  In turn, he told me about his recent treatment for epididymitis.   We continued our lively discussion as I drove him home.   I said that I would not message him so as not to seem like a creeper  ... but he could message me for hookup anytime he wanted.  He agreed.  At his house, he turned to me with a sweet smile, shook my hand and said, "Thanks!"  What a nice young man!

And what a sweet way to spend an hour!


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