Men kissing men

Today's pics are from menkissingmen.tumblr.com/.

Right from the first moment of my first sexual encounter with a man, kissing has been of primary importance to me, both as an expression of intimacy and as a means of arousal.  I've mainly kissed other men in private because in most parts of  prudish Canada (and I assume the USA) the sight of one man kissing another in public remains a big taboo.

Quite a few men won't kiss another man during a casual hookup, regarding it as too intimate.   Everyone should have to the right to their own preferences, of course, but it does seem odd to me that those same guys will then take a total stranger's cock and/or balls in his mouth (or stick his cock into their's) and not regard this act as "too intimate."   Just sayin'....

Except for when I'm giving a backseat blowjob to some anomymous (usually married) guy, I expect to be able to kiss the man I am with and generally will not hook up with a guy who refuses to kiss.  But it's not usually an issue since I discuss all this in advance of meeting in person.

Another issue which has come up recently (and resolved) has been the use of tongue during kissing also known as French kissing.  To tongue or not to tongue? 

I love French-kissing as long as it doesn't involve having a tongue jammed down your throat.  The object is not to test your gag reflex but to play "tag", touching the other guy's tongue briefly and then retreating and inviting him to respond in kind.  

I like to lightly sweep the tip of my tongue over the other guy's lower lip.   I also enjoy playing "capture" on a guy's tongue when it darts into your mouth, holding it there for a brief moment by lightly sucking on it.   Sweet!

I wonder what anyone else thinks about kissing?

Canada's first openly gay premier

Wow!   It's been a long time since I've posted.  It's  been extremely busy as we are between semesters at school;  supervising exams, marking them, preparing report cards and failure reports. 

Along with these Semester I tasks, we are getting ready for a new slate of Semester II classes... a double workload whammy!   I've also had a couple of my kids here this week and have been otherwise occupied with my new ... er... dating activities.   :-)

Ontario's new provincial premier*, Kathleen Wynn, is openly-gay, partnered and the mother of three adult children.  She's the first openly gay premier in the country's history, although there have been plenty of  openly-gay politicians elected to at all levels of government in Canada, except for the prime minister's office. 

*It should be noted that Ms. Wynn was NOT elected by the people of Ontario in a general election.  Rather, the current Liberal premier resigned after 23 years in politics and Liberal party delegates elected her at a recent convention.  The Liberals have been in power for nine years and face an uphill battle whenever the next election is held.

We've had our share of closeted politicians who were revealed to be gay only after they died, but the days when a Canadian politician could be in the closet are long gone.  Richard Hatfield, former premier of New Brunswick, was widely rumoured to be gay throughout his long political career in the 1970s and 80s.  It was apparently okay for a Canadian politician to be gay as long as he didn't "flaunt it", whatever that means.

Flash forward to 2011, when any Canadian politician snubbing the gay community would be widely viewed as taking a political risk.  This happened last year when the mayor of Toronto (Rob Ford ...a buffoon and an idiot) did not attend Toronto's 2011 Pride festivities.

A few things struck me about Ms. Wynn's appointment as premier:

When Ms. Wynn came out at the age of 37 over twenty years ago, she and her partner Jane Rounthwaite and her ex-husband arranged to live in neighbouring houses so their three children could go back and forth freely.

This is an ideal, accepting and mature arrangment which demonstrates a strong commitment to the children's well-being.  It would go a long way to allay one of the greatest fears of closeted married fathers;  that of losing contact with their children.   It reminded me somewhat of our summer arrangment, when my soon-to-be-ex-wife spends the entire summer at our friend's cottage a few kilometers down the beach from my home.  

I hadn't actually heard about Ms. Wynne being gay in the national media until she mentioned her partner in her acceptance speech, although it was widely known in her home area.   Today, the focus of a report on CBC Radio was not: "Is Ontario ready for a gay premier?"  but this new question.

"Are we ready to stop asking "Are we ready for a gay premier?""

 

If you can spare 22 minutes, click on the link above to listen to the whole interesting debate of the current state of gender, sexuality and politics in Canada.

New bare ass pics of Buddy

First, here are a few hot men - cute dog pics for Sean's Dogably Pawfect Saturday.

I spent Friday night at home feeling a little lonely... a rarity for me... although I was with my little doggie and my daughter.  Then I realized that it was the first day which I had not seen my new friend since we first met a week ago.  At least, as far as I remember.  It's been an event-filled week... a bit of a blur, actually.

I'm also wondering if I'm feeling out-of-sorts because I might be approaching a transition between my slut phase and something else ... but I am completely not certain. At some point, some discussion will be required. Need it be an all-or-nothing proposition?  

I've already turned down several less-appealing guys on POF.com with the excuse "I'm seeing someone."  I don't think that describes my situation at this stage in any way but it seemed a kinder way of giving someone the brush-off.   I just wasn't interested.

I`ve been camera-less for many months but no longer!  Cubby of Patently Queer generously sent me his excellent "old" camera which he no longer needed as his SmartPhone serves that function.  Thanks, Cubby!! 

So here are a few self-pics taken at sunrise today including the banner photo.  It's still pretty chilly but much warmer than it's been in recent days.  In the pictures, I'm looking out at my frozen front yard. 

I must say, I do like these photos of me  I've lost just over ten pounds and I can see the results already!  But the lighting I used for these pics  (candle + desk lamp) certainly created some odd-looking shadows on my legs .... but I couldn't be bothered to re-shoot them.

Long Johns

This post will be a collection of the most random of topics such as:

1.  The Weather:   Two nights ago, the temperatures here hit a low of -37 C  (-35 F).   At my house, this was combined with a howling wind off the water which made it feel like a million degrees below zero.   I love winter but at those temperatures, it is painful to go outdoors unless every bit of skin is covered up.  I'm now discovering first hand how badly insulated my new house really is.

On the plus side, it warmed up to -27 C  during the day which now seems positively balmy.

2.   Dating:    I can describe my first full week of dating as "intense" and I've been feeling rather off-balance.  But I really won't be blogging about it other than to say some aspects of it resemble "Buddy Bear:  the Extreme Make-over Edition."

3.  "What celebrity do you look like?"  On my previous post when answering this question, I told the story of a street person who said I looked like Brad Pitt.   Just to clarify:  bloggers who have met me in person like Cubby and Jeffrey will confirm that I do NOT look like Brad.

In fact, I heard from students for years at I looked like that doctor guy on the TV show "House"....  except I'm more grizzled and worn-out looking.   Several years ago, in fact, about six of my students came to class on Halloween all dressed as Dr. House in my honour.  The joke was somewhat lost on me as I don't have a TV in my house.  They had to explain who they were meant to represent.

4.  Affair with a married man:  It's been one year since I met "Special Guy", the married guy with whom I had a relationship or an "affair", whatever you want to call it, which fizzled out after four months.  It's a complicated, fucked-up story which should serve as a cautionary tale for any gay guy, especially an inexperienced gay guy like I was then.  I will blog about it soon.

Dating

After this weekend's activities, I might have to describe my present status as "dating." ....maybe.  But I don't know for sure since I haven't actually dated since the late 80s.  Back then, I dated very infrequently and since I wasn't actually interested in women (as we now know), it was a pretty futile exercise. 

But for the first time in my 50 years, someone else paid for my restaurant meal as a romantic gesture ... and it was rather sweet.   Dating actually requires far more courage than meeting up with a nameless 22-year-old for a five-minute, backseat blowjob.  I'm a bit tense and jittery right now, actually.

This meme comes from John who writes Rejected Reality, a "must-read" for me.

1. Has anyone ever told you look like a celebrity?
Yes, a couple of times.

I was walking in a big city one summer, tanned, with aviator sunglasses and my hair extra blonde because of sun streaks. A grizzled old man (a street person half lying on the sidewalk) yelled out, "Hey, you look like Brad Pitt!!" I laughed and said "Thank you!" At my age, I'll take a any complement, regardless of the source.

I already blogged about this second incident at Remington's, chatting up a hunky stripper boy (22) between acts.   He was grinding his bulge into me and trying to hustle a lap dance while I reached behind to cup his buttocks. He said, "You look like Bruce Willis!" I look nothing like BW but when I asked him to clarify, he said, "It's just that look in your eyes. Mischief. You're just bad!"

2. Is there an actor or actress whose movies you make a point to see?
Yes, Meryl Streep is fantastic and I've seen most of her movies, from Out of Africa and Silkwood to The Iron Lady.

3. What is your refreshment stand order at the movies? Nothing! I don't think movie popcorn is particularly healthy for you, all trans-fats, chemicals and salt, and it's outrageously priced. Occasionally, I'll bring a water bottle and a bag of black liquorice.

4. When was the last time you consumed an alcoholic beverage? I have no alcohol in the house; it's too expensive for my budget right now and it has too many calories for my weight-loss goals. But two weeks ago at my parents' house for dinner, I snuck a generous shot of brandy. I couldn't resist!

5.   Are you jumpy? Do you startle easily?   Nope, I have nerves of steel, I like to think, anyway.

6.   Do you wear a watch?
No. We teachers are slaves to the bell and there is a clock in every room ... there is no need!   During non-school hours, my cell phone does a dandy job as a watch stand -in.

7. When was the last time you tried a new restaurant? There are no new restaurants in my town and because of my budget, I RARELY eat in one.  I love cooking and can usually cook something better at home.  But when I'm in Toronto, I always eat in some family-owned, inexpensive, authentic restaurant specializing in Thai, Chinese or East Indian food. Bonus!

8.   What colour is your wallet? I don't have one; I keep all my cards and change in my car glove box (a bad practice, I know). I only carry in the cash or cards which I actually need.

9.   How much change is in your wallet? I never carry a wallet, but I always carry a few quarters and loonies in my pocket.




A random pic, perfect on a chilly morning.  I love the ... err... enhancing effect provided by gravity.

Filed for Divorce

It's another Dogably Pawfect Saturday by Sean of Just a Jeep Guy.  

The forecast is calling for another full week of overnight temperatures in the -25 to -32 C range  (-13 to -26 F) .....  darn cold!!   But today's high is expected to reach a balmy -10 C (14 F) with brilliant sunshine, so it is all good.

I haven't yet hauled my sorry arse out of bed, but am still cuddling here with my little dog and wishing I was with a man. I'm pretty tired because I achieved two fairly big milestones on my journey in one day, with a demanding day at work in between.

A.  I had an early-morning lawyer's meeting to file solely for an uncontested divorce and to pay their $850 fee.   This application (sometimes called a petition) was registered at the local provincial courthouse later that day.

Next steps:  the local court will seek clearance from the Central Divorce Registry in Ottawa to proceed.  The registry will confirm that we are actually married, that we are who we say we are and that we are not subject to divorce actions in other jurisdictons. 

In a month or so, my wife will be "served" with the divorce papers.  The expectation is that she will:  (1) sign them and (2) pay her $850 share of the legal fees.  My friends and family fully expect her to continue to 'do battle' and throw up some more roadblocks at this stage. 

My wife will be called into the lawyer's office to be served the papers face-to-face by our lawyer.  I doubt that she would have the courage to refuse to do either of those things without legal grounds, but it will be a tense month of waiting for me.

If all goes well with the signing, then my divorce petition will go back before the judge and should be final in about three months from now....  fingers crossed!!

B.   My first serious gay date (mentioned in my last post) happened after work the same day.   It went extremely well and we've been in contact several times since then, mainly by phone.  If I had a top 10 list of qualities I'd like to see in a future husband, he had every one of them.  I'm very certain that this feeling was mutual. 

But I won't be blogging about him or anything special which might possibly develop between us.  I just can't.  Sorry! 

TMI Thursdays

We're having our first really chilly night (-26 C  ....  -15 F) but we still have virtually no snow.  So all the pics are of lovely men in winter.

My lawyer seems highly motivated to proceed quickly with the divorce filing.  I will sign the forms tomorrow and pay half of the flat-rate fee, around $850.   My wife is receiving a separate invoice for her share so I can't imagine her having the courage to tell the lawyer that she won't pay it. 

My coffee date tonight with my new Flirtatious Friend (mentioned in my last post) has turned into dinner at a restaurant.  It might be my first gay date!

Here are my answers to Sean of Just a Jeep Guy's TMI Thursday feature:

WHAT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER WHEN?

1.     You are sick with the flu?   Our ethnic group has a flu "cure" which my family uses for every flu we've ever had.   The method seems bizarre once it is put in writing.  Drink a jug or more of warmed, blueberry juice, home-made with our wild blueberries ..... domestic blueberries are rubbish!   This will induce vomiting (I am normally kneeling in front of the WC before I start).  Drink more blueberry juice. Vomit.  Repeat until you no longer feel like throwing up.

Retire to your bed under a pile of comforters and let the flu take it's course, drinking more blueberry juice as needed.   This might not change the course of the flu but it makes us feel infinitely better.

2.     You are in a bad mood?   I am rarely in a bad mood during which I behave badly towards others.   If I am feeling in "a mood," it just means that I'm tired and hungry.  I soak in the tub or have a sauna, eat some excellent food and go straight to bed or some other quiet location. 

3.     You are alone?  I'm rarely alone at this point in my life, so I savour my "alone" moments.  In the evening, I cuddle in bed with my little dog, watch a DVD or go online and eat delicious, usually spicy food.   During the day if I'm alone, I might go for a run or walk, hike in the wilderness, cycle, snowboard or paddle my kayak;  anything in the great outdoors.

4.      You are sad?    The fact that I don't see all of my kids, all the time sometimes makes me sad.   I deal with it in the same way as in #3, above.  But mainly, I try to make the most of the time when some of my kids are with me which is the majority of the time anyway.

5 & 7.    You are angry?   I never get angry;  not seriously, anyway.  At 19, I underwent treatment for a Clark's level 4, stage IV metastatic malignant melanoma which my doctor described as a 'massive involvement.'  In 1982, this was normally a fatal condition (it still is, in fact), but due to dumb luck, I survived.

If I feel myself getting angry, I deliberately think myself back to that bleak, hopeless year as a cancer patient.   That will usually put any anger situation into context instantly.  I go far beyond "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff."   Except for your health, I know that it is ALL small stuff.

I must admit, however, that my coming-out and divorce drama has been very difficult to keep in this perspective.

6.     Are you frustrated?   My fantastic colleagues at my school and I face significant challenges and frustrations every day.  Many of our students come from broken homes and have backgrounds of poverty, unemployment, learning problems, drug / alcohol use and neighbourhood crime.   So... we can find endless support and excellent advice instantly as work-related frustrations occur by talking to each other.  

I ease the frustrations of my divorce drama with my wife by blogging about it and by discussing them with my parents and one or two trusted colleagues, all of whom know my wife very well.
 
You are horny?   Wanking off to online pics of naked men used to do it for me.   But now I find it a poor substitute for being able to pleasure a responsive, naked man in my bed.  More on this later....

td>

<//tr>

freeballing + spandex bulges + wrestler bulges

Just for fun, I've created a post which I hope will get the maximum possible number of pageviews.  I'm doing this by combining the top google search terms which bring guys to my blog.  These are the top three posts in the two years of my blog:

Freeballing            17,380 views
Spandex Bulges    14,039
Wrestler Bulges    11,013

In other news:

1. I haven't heard from my wife since our 'joint' versus 'solo' divorce-filing drama which I mentioned in my last post.  My view is that no news is good news .... wishful thinking maybe.
2. My eldest daughter (who just acquired a used car) told me that she will be spending alternate weeks with me and then with my wife.   She told me she missed spending time with me .... a very sweet thing to say!  Before she got her car, our driving schedule was a problem.  
3. I reflected yet again how lucky I am to have the support of my children.   But I also had to cancel Whimpering Hottie who is anxious for some more quality time with me between the sheets. No regrets, because I am confident that he will wait for me.  And if he doesn't, there seems to be a never-ending supply of young men to share my bed. 
4.  On Thursday, I have a date with my Flirtatious Friend, probably just for coffee.  I'm looking forward to meeting him 'in the flesh' because we've been chatting on pof.com for many months and he seems like a nice guy.

Now, on to the freeballing boys and bulging wrestlers! Any favourites?

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Divorce Filing Flip-Flop

Canadian school uses dogs as "Reading Buddies"

Here are some sweet pics for Sean's Dogably Pawfect Saturday.

More divorce drama;  just a little, anyway.  A close work colleague commented: "You should just expect erratic behaviour from your wife. Then when she behaves normally, that would be just a pleasant surprise."

Five days ago, my wife and I agreed to instruct our law firm to file jointly for an uncontested divorce.   With a joint filing and the signed Separation Agreement, our divorce would have been finalized in one month.... basically a rubber stamp. 

The firm had already started to prepare the paperwork for a joint filing and had suggested that we sign it separately to avoid a face-to-face meeting.  Two days later, my wife emailed the law firm at 11:00 pm to say that she would NOT be filing for divorce, with no prior discussion with me or the firm.  WTF? 

So ..... I will be filing for divorce by myself next week but this route will take three months to complete.

I can't imagine the reason for this flip flip but I won't be phoning to ask her about it.  I think the reasons listed below are all equally likely:

1. She wants to remain on my benefits for an extra two months before she has to pay on her own.
2. She's not ready to 'let go' and needs more time to emotionally prepare for our final divorce.
3. A continuation of her attitude:  "None of the problems in our marriage were my fault;  why should I have to file?" 
4. She's attempting to get out of paying the final $1,700 fee for the divorce.  Our Agreement specifies that each of us pays 50% of the cost, but if she reneges on this (as I expect her to), I will have to go through my lawyer to her lawyer to recover that money.

Canadian Service Dogs

In the end, the divorce will happen, but I find this all very disheartening.  I fully expect her to remain consumed with hatred and bitterness towards me for the rest of her life.

As a result, she'll never move on to an exciting, happy new life.  She will "do battle" regarding our obligations in our Agreement until it ends 6.5 years from now.   Sorry, I'm not normally this pessimistic but that's my view at this moment.

-------------------------------------------
I've been chatting quite a bit lately with an interesting local guy who I met on pof.com.  He's  47, two years out of a relationship, fully out, good-looking, successful and has ambitions and long-term goals.  He's also close to his family  ..... he has an older foster son, supports his disabled brother and bought the house next door for his parents.

When I say "chatting", I mean in the old-fashioned sense by talking on the telephone.  

We plan to meet in person soon but so far, our work and family obligations and some hesitancy on my part have prevented this from happening.  I am hesitant because he is the first local guy I've met who might seriously be "marriage material" and I'm just not ready for that.   It is so much easier to hook up with my 22 year old chew toys;  all fun and games with no serious thought or decisions required.

After last night's conversation, he sent me this message on POF:

My new friend:   Thanks for the opportunity to talk. You have a warmth to your voice. And a inflection of sexuality.
Buddy Bear:   Thanks!  I really enjoyed chatting with you as well.  As to the "inflection of sexuality",  I know that I have a bit of a gay-sounding voice.
My new friend:   I was referring to your voice in the manner of someone who can talk pillow talk, the kind of voice that can bring you to orgasm with out even touching....... :)

Too funny!  But **blush** I know that he's right.

Naked men in the shower

I'm such a blog-whore!  Having a provocative title like this will at least triple the number of hits to this post.

This is another installment of Just a Jeep Guy's TMI QUESTIONS:  a fresh clean start.   The pics are from hittheshowers.tumblr.com/

How often do you shower or bathe?  Once a day.

When do you like to shower?  A shower in the morning or a bath at bedtime;  not both.

Describe your shower or bath (or sauna) routine?  As a stress-reliever, I often soak in the tub in a darked room lit by a candle and with some scented oil   It also helps relieve my aches and pains.  But my morning showers are accomplished in one or two minutes, quickly working from head to toe with whatever No-Name product is closest at hand.  

About once a week, I spend an hour or more in my authentic wood-fired sauna by the water.  Bliss!!  I've posted sauna pics of me from this summer, here and here.

Do you like to shower (or bathe) with your significant other?  If I had a signicant other, I certainly would hope to!  My former Special Guy and I had a sexy shower as often as possible.

Shaving:  what, where and how often?   I shave my face twice on the day of a hookup .... quite a few of my 22 year men complained that my stubble hurt their baby-faces.   But if I don't have a hookup scheduled, I shave every third day as I like a bit of stubble.   I shave my shaft and balls once a month or so.

Do you shower at the gym or wait until you get home?  In my entire life, I have rarely set foot in a gym.  But if I did, I would shower there in the hopes of catching a glimpse of some hottie lathering his man-parts.

Before having sex do you like to be freshly showered?  Ripe?  Freshly showered, please, for both of us.

BONUS:  Sex in the bathroom:  shower, bath, hot tub, public?  My hottest shower-sex experience was with Hunky 22 year-old before I took his bottom virginity.   I also was part of a hot tub foursome (of sorts) last summer, but I wasn't really comfortable with the situation.

Legally separated.

These pics are from yummygingermen.tumblr.com  in honour of the sweet ginger lad who shared my bed on Monday.

On Sunday evening, my wife phoned to demand that we change our separation agreement so that she would receive the full alimony payment even if I suffered a reduction in income for health reasons, such as cancer or my spinal problem.  

As it was, the agreement allowed for a percentage reduction in alimony payments should my income be reduced due to illness.  I snarled at her, pointing out that spousal support was designed to equalize our incomes and not to provide a bottomless slush fund for her .... so she backed down  yet again.  I was pretty digusted with her at that moment, but it was just her anxiety talking.... I'll get over it.

 On Monday,  my lawyer and I signed numerous copies of our Separation Agreement dozens of times.  Legally separated, at last!!!   With the assistance of our lawyer-mediator at a different firm, we will file for a joint, uncontested divorce in a week or two.

After the signing, I literally raced out the door.   A 23 year old, sexually-inexperienced college dude was due at my house in thirty minutes, eager for some sexytime.

Whimpering Hottie, as I will call him, showed up early, handsome and slightly on the chunky side, but I forgive that on a young man.  He was of Swedish descent;  bright red hair, fair skinned and very blue of eye.  He had the most beautiful fat cut cock, decent length and a big pair of low-hangers, my favourite!  Whimpering Hottie was the most amazing kisser.... big, pouty, muscular lips the best tongue action I've ever experienced.  

What I liked most was his responsiveness;   as I worked my magic on his cock, balls and asshole, he gasped, moaned and caught his breath.   When I gave him a prostate massage and a well-lubed and aggressive ass-crack massage, he whimpered audibly .... something I've never heard a man do!!  It gave me so much pleasure to give him that much pleasure.  

Gosh it was fun!  Bringing him to the edge and making him whimper and then backing off for a while and then bringing him to a whimper again.  I felt like a virtuosos playing a violin.

He had wanted to lose his bottom virginity to me but I decided that it would better to wait for our second encounter.  I was concerned that the mechanics of  topping him (and his potential discomfort) would have ruined the sweet intimacy which we were enjoying.

Afterwards, Whimpering Hottie and I lay in bed for over two hours, limbs entwined, kissing sweetly and talked and talked and talked.  We talked about families, coming out... or not coming out, our sexual experiences and our jobs.  He was a part-time student and worked full-time in the admissions department at our local college so we had much in to talk about;  education and student success.    If he was 20 years older... even 15 years... I'd never have let him go!

Finally, he tore himself away and drove off into the cold, darkness but forgot his expensive watch on my bedside table.  I texted him later, promising to deliver it to him the next day.  He said, "Don't worry about it;  I'll get it the next time we're together!"    Sweet!!

My Sex Goals for 2013

I wrote about my other goals for 2013 in previous two posts, Part 1 and Part 2.    Having sex with men has been one of the most important parts of my coming out but I'm finding this post very difficult to write. 

What do I want? 

After being in a sexless marriage for 15 years, I spent 2012 wallowing in my sexual encounters with men.  Some of my encounters have been less-than-perfect but the vast majority have been fantastic, at least by my inexperienced standards.  

Every now and then, I think that I'm ready to move past casual hookups and to end my slut phase.  But I know for sure that I'm not yet ready to settle down with just one guy.  Every casual trip to the grocery story proves that to me .... I lust after every other man who walks by and imagine him writhing in pleasure as I suck his cock.  And if I haven't been with a man for three or four days, these urges become all-consuming.

Even with casual hookups, the other guy and I usually manage to create some degree of the intimacy I crave.  That is partially because I only accept hookup offers with men who are willing to kiss and cuddle, things I absolutely love and consider essential.

Arranging hookups online can be extremely time-consuming and a colossal pain in the rear.  Some guys require endless chatting and reassurances before I can reel them into my bed.  And a great many men with no experience at all (either in their early 20s or married guys in their 40s or 50s) just want to exchange sexy chat but are not ready to consummate the deal.

I would be open to sex with a regular fuck buddy a couple of times per week but a suitable candidate has not yet emerged.  All I'd need is a reasonably-fit, sane, single, passionate, aggressive, sexually-skilled man (aged 35 to 55) who is able to host.  Am I asking for the stars here?

My main problem was (and remains) that I can rarely host and turn down far more offers I can accept.  But when my divorce is final in a couple of months, I will be able talk more openly to the kids when I'm entertaining men.

My 2013 sex goals, in the purely physical sense, are:

1. Continue to increase my skills and confidence as a top.   I've recently discovered that tops are in great demand!
2. Despite my lack of comfort with being bottom, I am determined to keep trying.  My men get such enormous pleasure when I top them that I'm envious;  I want to experience that as well. 
3. If a fuck buddy emerges with a number of the qualities listed above, I will be open to that opportunity!
4. Suck as many cocks as possible, preferably thick, uncut ones.  I'm certain that I'm already an expert at this.
5. I need to start saying "No" to married men.  I'm not entirely comfortable being "The Other Man" and besides, they're usually in their 50s with a big bellies and are impossible to schedule.
6. I will continue to say "yes" to the offers I receive from men in their 20s without feeling guiltly.   They message me to have sex with them, not the other way around.  They are fun, uncomplicated, energetic, sexually adventurous, horny as hell and have beautiful bodies.  Why the hell not?

Goals for 2013 (Part 2 of 3)

It's another Dogably Pawfect Saturday by Sean of Just a Jeep Guy. 

These beautiful pictures were taken by the Atlanta photographer Joshua Thomas for a charity calendar which might not be be released until July 2013,  Hunks and Hounds.  Read an interview with  the photographer here. and check out his website.  

These are the rest of my goals for 2013 continued from  my previous post.  Note:   Goal #1 was copied verbatim from my resolutions from one year ago.

4.   Volunteer at one but preferably two LGBTQ organizations in town.

One organization needs volunteers to help at big events such as our Gay Pride week in June or our LGBTQ Film Festival. The other organization provides blanket support to LGBTQ folk in the community, but is located on campus of our local university so most of the clientele would be of university age.

However, I am concerned if I volunteer at the university-based organization that I will look like some lecherous old perv (which is what I actually am) who is only there to hookup with the hottie frat boys. Tricky!

I didn't even attempt to do this in 2012 because I was too stressed-out selling my house, moving, negotiating our divorce agreement and dealing with my prostate issues. 

But the main reason I didn't do it is that by joining one of these organizations I would have outed myself to the community at large.  I'm fine with that but I wanted my final divorce agreement signed first because I expect my ex-wife will react negatively to it.  So, next week, I will contact the LBTQ coordinators to find out how I can help.  I promise!

With my professional and interpersonal skills,  intelligence, common sense and life experience as a gay man coming out in middle-age, I think I have a lot to offer to the LGBTQ community including as a role model.  

5.   Find some more friends, preferably gay men.
I have only one extremely close friend in town who I've known since birth.  We were born days apart and were neighbours for 23 years until he married and I moved across the country.  But he lives 45 minutes away and has a very busy life as a straight divorced dad raising his kids so we don't have  as much contact as we'd like. 

It was hard to make new friends during the many years when my kids were young;  the demands of child-rearing mainly without help, dealing with my wife's erratic behaviour and earning a living gave me no time or energy for anything else.   Most of my "friends" in the old neighbourhood were just parents of my chidren's friends .... I probably would not have associated with them without that connection.  Once the kids grew up and moved on, I've only maintained contact with several of them but on my "B-list."

I'm still not convinced that it is possible for single, gay men who are looking for an LTR to be platonic friends.  Doug would be a great friend but he really wants to have sex with me and maybe even an LTR.   I consider myself friends with the two older gay men with whom we had the hot-tub party in August, but as they live 50 minutes away, getting together with them is a challenge.

When I volunteer with the local gay organizations this year, I will meet a wide variety of LGBTQ folks "in the flesh", not just online.  I hope develop a wider circle of friends among them.

My final goal:  SEX, SEX, SEX!  will be dealt with in my next post.