After being in a sexless marriage for 15 years, I spent 2012 wallowing in my sexual encounters with men. Some of my encounters have been less-than-perfect but the vast majority have been fantastic, at least by my inexperienced standards.
Every now and then, I think that I'm ready to move past casual hookups and to end my slut phase. But I know for sure that I'm not yet ready to settle down with just one guy. Every casual trip to the grocery story proves that to me .... I lust after every other man who walks by and imagine him writhing in pleasure as I suck his cock. And if I haven't been with a man for three or four days, these urges become all-consuming.
Even with casual hookups, the other guy and I usually manage to create some degree of the intimacy I crave. That is partially because I only accept hookup offers with men who are willing to kiss and cuddle, things I absolutely love and consider essential.
Arranging hookups online can be extremely time-consuming and a colossal pain in the rear. Some guys require endless chatting and reassurances before I can reel them into my bed. And a great many men with no experience at all (either in their early 20s or married guys in their 40s or 50s) just want to exchange sexy chat but are not ready to consummate the deal.
I would be open to sex with a regular fuck buddy a couple of times per week but a suitable candidate has not yet emerged. All I'd need is a reasonably-fit, sane, single, passionate, aggressive, sexually-skilled man (aged 35 to 55) who is able to host. Am I asking for the stars here?
My main problem was (and remains) that I can rarely host and turn down far more offers I can accept. But when my divorce is final in a couple of months, I will be able talk more openly to the kids when I'm entertaining men.
My 2013 sex goals, in the purely physical sense, are:
- Continue to increase my skills and confidence as a top. I've recently discovered that tops are in great demand!
- Despite my lack of comfort with being bottom, I am determined to keep trying. My men get such enormous pleasure when I top them that I'm envious; I want to experience that as well.
- If a fuck buddy emerges with a number of the qualities listed above, I will be open to that opportunity!
- Suck as many cocks as possible, preferably thick, uncut ones. I'm certain that I'm already an expert at this.
- I need to start saying "No" to married men. I'm not entirely comfortable being "The Other Man" and besides, they're usually in their 50s with a big bellies and are impossible to schedule.
- I will continue to say "yes" to the offers I receive from men in their 20s without feeling guiltly. They message me to have sex with them, not the other way around. They are fun, uncomplicated, energetic, sexually adventurous, horny as hell and have beautiful bodies. Why the hell not?