Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Tom Daley

It's been a drama-filled week, all of it centred around my ex.  And although I've tried by best to avoid it, I've  been sucked right into it. Looking back, I can't imagine how I survived so many years of hatred and erratic behaviour. Exhausting!

But I would like to join every gay blogger in the world in congratulating Tom Daley on his courageous coming out.  I say "courageous" because in just 16 hours, his youtube clip had over three million page views.

My own coming-out to my children and then my parents was one of the most nerve-wracking things I'd ever done but it involved a total of five people!  I came out nearly three years ago, but that seems like an eternity ago.

I smiled during the first part of the clip because he was so sweet and hesitant but as his conversation with the world progressed, I found myself getting a bit misty-eyed.  I like how he didn't label himself as 'bi' or 'gay', just that "I met someone .... and that someone is a guy." 

When I met someone and they made me feel so happy, so safe and everything just feels…great.   Well that someone is a guy, and it did take me by surprise a little bit.” - Tom Daley

His last comment resonated strongly with me except I was more than a "little bit" surprised.  I truly didn't believe I was 100% gay until my first hookup with a man.  I wasn't prepared for the intensity of my gayness once I allowed the denial to drop away.


  1. First congratulations to him. As well as to Bob on Biggest Loser for coming out last week. Second, I so wish non gay people could understand how difficult it is for us to accept being gay. Doesn't make a difference if you are having sex or not, there is such a stigma (luckily it is lessening) that it is easier to deny yourself than it is to accept the reality. Would I do it again? I can honestly say I don't know. It has cost me a lot. Everything in fact. But I do know I couldn't continue with denial. Love to all.

    1. My town and country is very different from where you live. I feel and have experienced no stigma at all.

      So you really would have been better off NOT coming out? Hmmmm.

      I will say that you could have handled your coming out better than you did, behaviour-wise.

  2. I posted this comment on another Canadian blog but I think it deserves to be here, too:

    When any public figure comes out I admire them; the more the general public sees us everywhere in society at large, the better for us, for society, and for the heterosexual population.

    BUT I really love it when athletes come out. I know it takes a lot of guts, as the culture of the locker room is not always congenial to gays. But most of all, the athlete has been elevated to iconic status as the clean, manly, admirable flag bearer for all that is good and strong and admirable. Of course many of them are nothing of the kind and some are deeply corrupt, but the mania to deify the athlete persists. When the public sees that one of these heroes can be both everything it wants and imagines them to be while also being gay, it's a very powerful motivation for acceptance of gays and lesbians across the board. I had no idea who Tom Daley was until I read about him thanks to you. My admiration, compliments and best wishes to him!

    1. Thanks for that fantastic comment! I agree, when athletes such as he hunky rugby star Gareth Thomas come out, it makes a huge impact.

      But every "coming out" contributes to the public's overall knowledge and the normalization of gays.

      As an out day high school teacher, I feel that very strongly every day.

  3. Now I can get in line! HAHAHAHA

    Peace <3

  4. The common ambiguous declaration of love, universal of gender. It is like a gay right of passage, I doubt we'll ever see him with a girl. But who cares, fair play to him.

    1. I agree, good for him! But I lol'd at his statement: "But of course I still fancy girls." Denial still rearing its ugly head!

  5. Ex's and love is never easy!
    Good for him!

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