I am 53 and an out gay father from BC, Canada. My wife found out I was gay six years ago; much drama ensued but we achieved a reasonably non-adversarial divorce. Woo-hoo! I now try to balance my new sex and social life with family, career and LGBTQ social activism. I am mainly living on my own because my three adult kids are now making their way in the world. I now am an LTR having met my soulmate and am embarking on the most exciting phase of my journey so far!
Friday, December 23, 2011
Foreskin Friday
A few more lovely foreskin pictures as blog decoration. They all came from http://foreskinfriday.tumblr.com/.
A bit of drama this week but thank goodness, none of it involved me directly. My wife had a screaming fight with our 15-year-old son on Sunday and he phoned to say he was moving back in with me "permanently." After a lengthy discussion with my sobbing wife who also wanted him "out", he's been with me all week.
We strongly feel that all the kids would benefit from spending time with each of us. Also, just between us girls, I wouldn't actually want him with me full-time. After a cooling-down period, my son returned to my wife's house for the weekend.
My wife has never been able to cope with the occasional sullen behaviour of a teenager. I reminded her that she was the adult in the situation and that a little self-control would go a long way. Her problem is that she is always has to be right and always has to have the last word. I told her that our daughter finds it stressful being in the same house with them .... she is constantly being called upon to referee their disputes. When they're not actually fighting, they are constantly provoking each other until a fight does break out. Neither of them has the sense to know when to stop.
By contrast, my son and I rarely fight; he gets more cooperative, talkative and friendly with me as time goes on. However, we rarely talk about emotions or personal matters; instead, we talk about his latest welding project or what we should do to fix the carburetor on the ski-doo.
During these times of stress, my wife continues to harp on the fact that my being gay is "damaging" to our son and causing the conflict between them. Grow up!! For the first time since I came out to him 10 months ago, I asked him, "Does it bother you that I am gay?" He said that he couldn't care less.... it makes no difference to him at all. He also added that all of his friends think that I am the coolest Dad ever. (I don't know if they know I'm gay... probably not)
None of this drama has affected the warm relationship that now exists between me and my wife. We have many phone, text or e-mailed conversations every day and they continue to be full of compassion and concern. I don't understand this transformation but won't complain ... but it certainly makes the process of getting divorced go a lot smoother.
Tonight, both daughters are with me. The birthday girl (17 years old) is night skiing with a gaggle of friends at a ski resort about two miles away. In three hours, they will descend upon the house for food and a movie-night sleepover. I must sign off .... there is much to do, much to do!
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me likey the last guy!
ReplyDeleteGuy with the towel is absolutely beautiful.
ReplyDeleteIt's cool that your is fully accepting that you are gay. How do your daughters feel about it?
I hope it can be a happy christmas in some way, and a much more splendid new year !
ReplyDeleteHungry teenagers descending upon your house after skiing - good luck with having any food in the house in the morning. LOL
ReplyDeleteYes, the towel guy is hypnotically attractive - AND besides, I regard it as a bonus when such a beauty has something one can (very gently) chew on!
ReplyDeleteAlways good to see you have something to distract you occasionally from the tribulations of married/divorced life with all it's pernickety permutations of emotions regarding offspring etc.
I would like to add my sincere wishes that you have a smooth and peaceful festive season and a 2012 much less rocky than this year has been for you.
anne marie: I hope you have a great Christmas! I loved the last guy's beefy thighs, furriness and, actually, everything else about him too.
ReplyDeleteMind of Mind: My daughters are also completely okay with me being gay. We were the most concerned about my son because he was the youngest. Also, boys of gay dads commonly have the worry that it means that they are more likely to be gay as well.
Ur-Spo: I promise, it will be very happy Christmas in most ways because I'll be with family the whole time. (Sadly, I won't see all the kids, all the time ... but that is our new reality.) Due to our marital problems, previous Christmases had always been extremely tense and that problem is now gone.
RG: Yes, but I'm a very experienced parent and so laid in a large supply of fruit, veggies, salad and hot chocolate. Since it was an "all-girls" event, everything had to be healthy. Not a can of pop or potato chip in sight.
Raybeard: thank you! Best wishes in 2012!
Have a wonderful weekend, and thanks for the ManCandy alongside your update. Always a welcome distraction to my reading.
ReplyDeleteI so love to unzip a fly and find an uncut cock. It is far too rare an occurrence here in the US, which just makes it sweeter when it happens.
ReplyDelete