Thursday, July 21, 2011

Doing the Nasty

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Continued from my previous post, Losing My Gay Virginity!   For the experienced gay guys reading this, my first sexual  encounter with a guy might seem a very  "plain vanilla", even boring,  in terms what we did. 

For me it was  the most intensely sensual, sexual experience of my entire life  (so far, at least)

What made it so special?
  • The main difference here, obviously, was that I was with a man,  Although I'm quite sure that I would still be able to have sex with a beautiful woman and enjoy it,  at that instant, I finally discovered that my primary sexual and emotional interest was with  men. 
  • I was in bed with a sweet, thoughtful young man who I was intensely attracted to, both emotionally and sexually.  I didn't have to "work at it" or worry about losing my erection as I used to during heterosexual sex.  I was hard as a rock!
  • I have long moved past the insecurities and lack of self-confidence of my 20s which would have spoiled the moment.  Although I had no experience at all (for example, did not know how to give / receive a blowjob)  I was determined not to worry about it.  Hottie Nurse went into this knowing fully who he was dealing with.  My gay virginity might have been part of my appeal to him;  I didn't ask.
  • I was fully "present", enjoying every second as it occurred.  Throughout I thought, "I can't believe I'm doing this!   Savour it!!"  The sense of unreality was so intense that it felt like an out-of-body experience.   I knew darn well that this sort of opportunity doesn't coming along every day for old farts like me.
  • It was the very first time that I didn't have to take the lead during sex.  Hottie Nurse was extremely aggressive and very much a "take charge" kind of guy.   It took me a few moments to allow myself to surrender to that aggression, to not take the lead, but once I did, it was fantastic!  unreal!   
  • Once, I did flip Hottie Nurse onto his back and took charge for a bit.  I thought it  was like the hottest, most sensual naked wrestling match ever.
  • A terrible, horribly-embarassing disclosure:  this was the first time I'd had sex with another person in fourteen years.  While this may seem bizarre to many people, I know that the majority of closeted  gay guys with children, married to an angry, aging wife, face the same situation.... a non-existent marital sex life.  
In writing this post, I'm focusing on my thought and emotions of this encounter.  I don't think writing porn is in my future; I  just can't write smut convincingly.   Hard to describe what we did, but here it goes!

"What now?" I asked.  He said with some irony, "You have to take your clothes off!" and gestured at the bed with a sweeping motion of his arm.  Each of us dropped our clothes on the floor, jumped into bed and off we went!   He rolled on top of me and began kissing, aggressively, deeply, with an intensity I'd never experienced.  Is it possible to have a muscular tongue and lips?  Well, he had 'em!

He was certainly the best kisser I've ever had;  alternating kissing my lips and then sucking them, kissing, sucking, kissing...  deep tonguing.  The kissing went on forever and I was pressed deeper and deeper into the mattress by his force.  I tried to give back as good as I got, but he was just so aggressive!  I felt his hot breath on me eveywhere.

He continued tonguing and kissing the rest of me, ears, up my neck, and down my neck, into its crook  He  grabbed both my arms and pushed them over my head and licked my pits..long slow, thorough licks  I thought it would be tickish... and a bit weird, but it was fine.  Hairy pits were his favourite thing, it seems.

He then licked and nibbled up and down my torso. sucking on my nips (not much feeling there) and back up to my mouth again..

While he was kissing, I reached down and grabbed onto his cock... It was as hard as skin-covered steel!   Oh, to be in my 20s again!   I got the firmest possible grip on his cock with my fist and he thrust his pelvis as thought he was getting a hand job.   His pelvis pumped  back and forth with increasing frequency.  I loved the feeling of his foreskin in my hand retracting back and forth. ,While I had his whole cock in my hand, I SQUEEZED the end rubbed my thumb around the base of the head;  it must have felt great!   He did the same to my cock, while he licked my pits and sucked my lips.

At one point, I pointed his cock at my virgin ass  and he continued to hump, thrusting into my ass crack.  No penetration of course, but that pressure on the end of his cock must have felt good to him;  it felt good to me!

Still on my back , I spread my my legs spread wide and he shifted position, lying between my legs with our cocks pressed together.  He ground his cock into mine.  Each of us was grinding our pelvises into the other, grinding, grinding, grinding, up and down, side to side and then in a circular motion.  .... super hot..... I think might be called dry humping or frottage.  I think it was the thrusting that made it so hot... it is just such a natural movement for men.

After a very long time ...had to have been an hour.. of him exploring every part of my body (except my ass and cock) and with me reciprocating.... much of the time I was pinned to the mattress and he took charge.

He allowed me to flip him over and I licked my way down his torso to his cock and took it in my mouth. My first blowjob!   It was very large in girth at the bottom and oddly skinny at the end.  At the first mouthful, I thought, "Oh my God, I can't take it in!"   I had to open my mouth wider than was comfortable at first.  The girth at his cock's base was so much, it was hard to take in.

Slowly, slowly I began pumping his cock with my lips, from base to tip of his cock, applying as much pressure as I could muster.  I'm thinking, "No teeth!!"  I varied the routine by intense tonguing of the end of his cock and in/around his foreskin while pumping the shaft with my hand.   After (I think) several minutes,  I tried for  some 'deep throat' action, taking his entire cock in my mouth again and ramming the end into the back of my throat with some force.   I was surprised when I only gagged slightly several times. I loved it... this was my favourite part.  Feeling his cock ramming into the back of my mouth, knowing that would just be driving him insane with pleasure as the nerves compressed.   I continued this with increasing frequency, faster, faster., faster.... He wasn't very vocal but was lying back,  groaning slightly, eyes closed, abs clenching.

With out letting up, I focussed all the pressure on the last inch of his cock, grind, grind grind with my mouth until I felt his cock pulsing in my hand and mouth.  I held his cock in my mouth for a moment, motionless,until the pulsing stopped and then I slowly, slowly pulled away, keeping pressure on it all the while.

I said to him, "There wasn't much volume there!"  He said that he jerked off before he came to pick me up, so he wouldn't come too soon.  Again, to be in my 20s again!

We changed positions and he began to work on my cock.  It felt great:  my first blowjob ever.   He licked up and down my cock, paused, deep throated a bit.... constantly changing.   I started to think that he wasn't very good at it.  He would play with the head, deep throat a bit to bring me to the edge and then stop and lick my balls or something.  A bit of a disappointment, just slightly, as after while I knew I wouldn't come.

Like any middle-aged man, I needed some continuous, unrelenting action at the end of my cock to come.  After several minutes him of working my cock (don't get me wrong, it felt fantastic!!), it started to move from pleasure to pain ... just overly sensitive, so I had him stop.  I might have come just a bit, but I'm not sure.   Had I known him better, and had I know an expert cocksucker does to get a guy off, I would have made a few suggestions.  But the fact that I didn't come was not a big deal.... it was a fantastic, memorable experience!  Being my first time, I probably was a bit anxious as well.

Again, this post is long enough.  In two days,  I will describe (to me) the best part of our encounter, the afterglow.  ..... lying together naked for a couple of hours with our limbs twined, holding each other tight, talking about sex, laughing, teasing.  And finally,  him napping with his head on my chest.  Sweetness!


  1. It's hard for me to imagine a better first-time experience than the one you described. You will remember this one until your dying breath.

  2. I agree with Cubby. So often you hear about "first times" that are anything but memorable.

  3. Wow! I can't wait for the next post. :-)

    I feel so hot now... and it has nothing to do with the summer weather.

    So happy for you Buddy Bear. ;-)

  4. anne marie in phillyJuly 21, 2011 at 3:23 PM

    hot hot hot! WOW!

    PS - sometimes we str8s are in the same boat (no sex for years, etc.). ask me how I know this...

  5. Good for you for coming out to your family. Yes, it's painful for all. I speak as a straight ex-wife who found out by accident. My ex would never have told me. We're divorced, and it started out amicable. But once he found out there was going to be a financial price tag, he got nasty. I took the high road and never said a bad thing to our children about their dad even though I was tempted. He did horrid things and now he's paying the price in many ways.

    I wish you well in your new life, but please be careful. There's a lot of HIV out there and people aren't honest about it.

  6. Great story - thanks for sharing!!

  7. I've read your posts from the start and have enjoyed them. But for some reason recently I have had a growing suspicion that your a story teller and that the blog itself is fiction, however enjoyable.

  8. You say "I just can't write smut convincingly." Really? You could have fooled me! (Let's substitute the word 'sex' for 'smut', as the latter has overtones of something undesirable, which what you write about is certainly NOT.)
    You're writing steams up my computer screen - from the inside!
    Btw If you ever want advice on giving good B.J. I'm always here. In fact if I was there right now with you I'd offer to give you a practical demonstration.

  9. That was amazing! I'm so glad that your experience was so good and you enjoyed it so much! I had very similar thoughts when I had sex for the first time, like "remember: no teeth". It did bring back memories!
    Thanks for sharing!

  10. Cubby, BentonQuest, Nik: It was a unforgettable 'first time.' Hottie Nurse is a tough act to follow, that's for sure! If only he was at least 10 years older and didn't live thousands of miles away from me. In his maturity level, he reminded me more of my children that a potential life partner.

    Maggie: thanks for sharing your story. Both my wife and I are trying hard to not badmouth the other to the kids. I am aware there will be a whopping financial price to paid (mainly borne by me) but I think that less devastating than my wife having her life torn apart after 20 years of marriage to a gay man.

    Yes, Thanks for the HIV warning. Yes, I'll be careful! I think my "slut phase" will be a very short one.

    Anonymous: "Growing suspicious that ....your blog itself is fiction." That is too funny! I don't actually care what you think, but I assure you every word is true! E-mail me privately and I might be able to convince you.

    Raybeard: Thank you! I was planning on seeking advice on giving / receiving blowjobs.... a future post?

  11. Wow, this actually got me hard. But I am really glad that you have had such a memorable first time. You will remember it forever but the nurse is still young and there is a lot more out there that you will enjoy.

    Anal sex for instance, I am interested to read about your encounters with being a top and bottom should they happen.

    Plus you don't need advice on giving a good blow job, you are a man and you know what you like and how to perform a blowjob is like fixing the clock on the microwave, it is intuitive.

  12. Hey Buddy Bear! Just came across your blog - this is a terrific series of posts.

    I've been gay my whole life, out some 40 years now. I went through a long period of celibacy myself from late 1994 to about 2008/2009. I think I had a pretty good reintroduction to a sex life, but nothing as amazing as what you describe. Vanilla, maybe, but so what. It's about what two (or more) guys bring to each other, what spirit they bring into the play, rather than the specific details of who put what where how, etc. This is a hot story. Thank you.

  13. Just now found your blog and read this great post. I just recently had my first experience with another man, actually two, it was a three-way. It was fantastic. I wish I hadn't waited until I was fifty years old. Like you, I didn't get off the first time, it must be nervous tension. I'm glad to hear that I'm not the only one that happened to.
    Thanks for the great blog.

  14. Very interesting....I still remember the first time. His target was my navel and I couldn't ejaculate.....

  15. hey show me a pic of you cock id really love to see it

  16. The natural movement of trusting feels wonderful....and I ready to ejaculate too....


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