It's been a slow week on pof.com and bear411.com. I've only had several messages, all from guys in their early 20s. These young 'uns were very appealing but all wanted to hook up "right now." Although I try to be flexible in my availability, family or work commitments often make these sorts of quickie hookups impossible. Darn!
I think Jared (Closeted in College) summarized this situation best when he commented on a previous post: "I find older guys tend to want more set up, as opposed to younger guys, I can usually be in the car minutes after the first message.."
Although I'm still 'newbie' in making love to a man (or should I say, "having sex with...") I've gained in self-confidence and learned new tricks from every single sexual encounter, especially the ones with experienced men. Recently, my regular guy complimented me on my new skills and my passion and /or aggression. This was a bit awkward since we haven't actually had the "exclusive" versus "not exclusive" discussion yet so I didn't tell him where these new tricks came from.
The photos are for Dogably Pawfect Saturday, created by Sean of Just a Jeep Guy DC. I get more referrals from his blog than any other; thanks Sean!
Ah, to be one's twenties again and be able to gratuitously ignore spontaneous erections....
ReplyDeleteOf course as an older fellow I knew once told me "never waste a perfectly good erection."
This seems to be a weekend for pooches and their papas. I have seen 'dog' postings on a handful of blogs. Dogs! I am most grateful for their love and companionship.
ReplyDeleteI think you can say 'making love' to a man... even if you're not 'in love' at the time. It a wonderful connection with another human being.
ReplyDeleteNot really a fan of the term "making love", when you're not in love. I know the feeling sometimes the sex is so great and the connection is so real, that it can be mistaken with love, though it's likely just chemical infatuation.
ReplyDeleteIt's all just semantics, but I try to refer to it mentally as just great sex, often that's all I want, great sex, I don't always get it, but it pretty obvious to me, and the other person when 2 people click.
Thank you, Gay Groom and Jared, for your excellent points of view!
ReplyDeleteMy advice would be to finesse the "exclusive/non exclusive" conversation for a good while. My guess is that your regular boyfriend's compliments on your new skills, along with being cool enough not to ask "Hey, where did you learn THAT?", indicates that he's aware on some level that you may have other outlets and that he can handle it.
ReplyDeleteAlthough you're managing this phase of your life very well, there are a lot of experiences still to have that will add to your skills and ability to deal with disappointments as well as successes. And when a man comes out late, he generally needs a little "catch up" time. It would good to let this happen before settling down. Has your guy ever confided whether he has other men in his life? It may not be an issue and, should your relationship become more permanent, freedom for some outside encounters and/or to bring another man in to join you occasionally, as with us, can be a very pleasant way to live.