All pics from http://bananasling.tumblr.com.
To continue the short shorts theme from the previous post, one day in the early 80s when I was sixteen, I was alone in my parents' car and stopped at a red light. A early 20ish hottie (similar to the guy on the left) pulled up beside my car window on his bicycle wearing very short cut-off denim shorts.
His midsection was just a foot away, framed in my car window. I saw ... oh my gosh!.... one of his low-hanger testicles was hanging way below the bottom of his shorts. I just thought it was very funny, as he was so unaware of his exposure. All that wrinkled skin! Did he not feel a breeze?
That's what the 80s short shorts gave us, some of the time anyway, peep shows everywhere you went. Fun times! Does anyone have any any "peep show" stories they wish to share?
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My wife has missed out on a few houses which she was interested in because the successful buyers offered 10 - 20% higher than the asking price. Our local real estate market is insanely hot right now, so for the next house, we agreed that she will have to offer higher than the asking price.We had a face-to-face meeting, our first in several weeks, to try to finalize our settlement negotiations. My wife was in a bad mood going into the meeting. She tried to manipulate the outcome (as is her habit) by being, in sequence, aggressive, bullying, angry and then self-pitying, "I wasted 14 years of my life so deserve this money.... "
My visit to my lawyer strengthened my resolve so I became aggressive right back, reminding her repeatedly, "We're here to talk about the money... this is only about the money..."
Although I was on the receiving end of a fair bit of anger, blame and name-calling, it turned out to be highly productive meeting. I forced the discussion and we came to an agreement on most of the contentious issues ... but my wife abruptly left as the discussion was becoming too emotional and difficult for her. Only a couple of more items to go!
Here's what will happen: there will be a "cooling down" period of a few days, Then my wife will phone to continue the negotiations in a much more pleasant frame of mine.... been there, done that!
Surely you understand why your wife is probably feeling a little bitter(Justifiably).
ReplyDeleteI've made it extremely clear throughout all my blog writing that I am sympathetic to my wife's situation. I am trying very hard to ensure that I do the best for her future. If I didn't, she could very well end up destroyed, financially and emotionally and my children would be stuck looking after her for the rest of their lives.
ReplyDeleteHowever, even if I had been completely heterosexual, our marriage had no future. I raised my children virtually as a single parent as I dealt with years of criticism, anger, abuse and erratic behaviour. To this day, she refuses to seek treatment for her A.D.D., major depression and anger management issues. I went to counselling, marriage and otherwise, but that is pretty futile when your wife refuses to go.
Now, I am constantly asked by family and friends who know us both, "Why did you stay?" The answer: had I walked out, I would have feared for their safety. Pretty blunt, but it's the truth. Now that the kids are young adults / older teens, that is no longer an issue.
The situation facing every closeted, married guy is unique, all of them difficult, and I am never judgmental when commenting on other guy's blogs. No one can understand the situation except for those who are in it.
No truer words have been spoken than every situtation is unique. Thanks to you and others, I am planning my future. Never thought I would have the courage. Still don't in fact, but at least now I am going to try. I expect a lot of the "I wasted...." But the truth is, WE have wasted time as well. And I for one am going to use that as a reply. Frankly Buddy, I think you may need to point out that. You mentioned that even if straight, the marriage was doomed. I don't mean to sound harsh, but the fact is she didn't hold up her end of the marriage either. BTW, please remind me I have said this when it comes my time.
ReplyDeleteKevin
Please send the guy from Pic #1 to my house.
ReplyDeleteWait, scratch that. Send him to the No Tell Motel instead and tell him I'll meet him there.
As for Mrs. Buddy, I think although there may be a high stress event every so often, in all the split has gone very well. I'm sure you agree x ten.