Prostate Needle Biopsy

This entire post consists of "too much information" but most men don't know anything about their prostate, so here it goes!  I've been procrastinating about writing this because my visit to The Prostate Centre was very stressful, bringing back horrible memories of my year as a cancer patient when I was nineteen.

Initial Assessment:  Sept. 10
My doctor (the head of the department) did a quick digital exam and pronounced my prostate "smooth."  He added that a digital exam can only reach the bottom part of the prostate.  "Smooth" is a good thing;  "lumpy" would be very bad indeed.  I told him that my own doctor has said it was "puffy" which might indicate an infection.  He said firmly, "Well it's not... it's perfectly normal!"

He was highly reassuring, saying that only 1 - 2% "at the very most" of patients in my situation end up in a "difficult situation" which I took to mean a massive spreading of the cancer and  death.   He said that unless the Gleason Score of a prostate cancer was high (which gives an indication of how aggressive it is ), they prefer a non-interventionist approach and generally do no treatment at all, no surgery, no Brachytherapy.   Most prostate cancer patients will die of old age long before their cancers ever become a problem.... but in this respect, my relatively young age (50)  is very much working against me.  

Although he said needle biopsies are a bit random, it is the only way to find cancer cells, so I agreed to have one.  He pondered my wildly-fluctuating PSA levels  (Jan. 9.0, Apr. 6.0, July 19.5, Sept. 8.5) and said, "Hmmm .... it might be infectious," meaning, I think, a condition like prostatitis.

Needle Biopsy:  Sept. 19
The required "prep" for the biopsy is as undignified a thing as one could  imagine.   I arrived at my in-law's Toronto house at 10:30 pm following my sweet gay date with an online friend.   Midnight found me in their tiny shower enclosure with my Fleet enema kit, doing a modified shoulder stand,  bum pointing heavenwards.

Trying not to wake up the whole household, I reached around to squirt the solution of (I think) saline, mineral oil and phosphates into my asshole.  A few minutes later, the explosive emptying of my lower colon gave the most fantastic poo-gasm!    A nice 'empty' feeling with a  poophoria after-glow.  An unexpected bonus!

TRUS (trans rectal ultra sound) probe

The staff at the Prostate Centre were highly professional and efficient.   Within minutes of arriving, I was on a treatment table in a modified fetal position with my rear end pointing upwards at a 45 degree angle.  Members of the team crowded around and in turn, examined my asshole with great interest.

A slightly uncomfortable digital exam followed.  I`ve had lots of fingers up my butt in bed and in doctor`s offices but never quite as... er... deeply.... nor as firmly.   The TRUS (trans rectal ultra sound) probe was inserted with lots of lube and was angled this way and that to give the best possible image. 

This was quite comfortable as the TRUS was much skinnier than the couple of cocks I`d had up there... thank God I had tried being a bottom!  I`m sure that a bottom-virgin straight guy would find this procedure extremely distressing.

The doctor announced he was going to freeze my prostate with a local anesthetic.  I didn`t even feel the needle going in.   Shortly afterwards, I heard a sharp SNAP!  SNAP!  SNAP! .... just like the sound made by a staple gun.

He had started using "the biopsy gun — a hand-held device with a spring-loaded, slender needle removes a cylinder of tissue (about 1/2" by 1/16") in a fraction of a second. A sliding sheath opens once the needle enters the prostate, closes onto a sample of tissue and the needle is withdrawn." 

I asked, "Is this it?"  The doctor said, "Yes, but I've just started."  Such was their skill that I was completely pain-free .... only the deepest samples resulted in some discomfort.  Dental visits to have a tooth cavity filled are far more uncomfortable.  Other men (including my father) reported feeling excruciating pain during their biopsies and leaving the table drenched in sweat. 

I closed my eyes and counted... twelve, thirteen, fourteen.... and we're done!  Woo-hoo!!  They made me wait for a hour and then I was off on my fun, 'free day' in Toronto starting with meeting Jeffrey for coffee on Church Street.  

After-care:  My rear end was a bit tender to sit for a few hours afterwards ..... rather like when I lost my bottom virginity, but it quickly recovered.   I'll be on an antibiotic for several days and will see traces of blood in my poop, pee and cum for a couple of weeks at least.  

After the procedure, I asked my doctor, "I'm gay, right?  How long do I have to wait before I can be penetrated anally again?"   (Jeff had suggested I ask this)   The doctor didn't bat an eye, "WHAT A GREAT QUESTION!!"  he boomed with enthusiasm and a smile.   "Give it 7 - 10 days and you'll be fine!"

I'm back in Toronto on October 11th for the results... and I will find the waiting to be pretty tense.