I was pretty upbeat after the success of my needle biopsy and my exciting day in Toronto. But this weekend, I was getting extremely discouraged, depressed even, about the possibility of having cancer.
I've often heard that waiting for biopsy results is the worst part of the whole process.... the uncertainty of it all. Actually, that is NOT true. I know from first-hand experience that a positive biopsy result is far worse because it leads to such atrocities such as surgeries, radiation treatments, chemotherapy, recurrences and hundreds of hours spend in cancer clinic waitings. Been there, done that.
I am feeling fine! My antibiotics are almost finished with no signs of infection and I have no discomfort at all.
For the first time since the procedure, I wanked off yesterday morning to test things out. I was absolutely confident that everything would work just fine and it did, thank you very much. But I was pretty grossed out to see what looked like bright red blood squirting out instead of transparent, colourless semen. I know it wasn't 100% blood but it was pretty disturbing just the same. All the other liquids and solids originating "down there" continue to contain blood as well. I can't wait for it to stop!
To distract myself, I attended a running race but as a spectator, not a competitor. I was overwhelmed by the hot men running by with beautiful runner's legs and asses. The vast majority were gorgeous specimens of manhood and mainly in my favourite 30s and 40s age group.
Many of the older guys wore spandex shorts or tights. While their bulges were fantastic, the curves tracking along the backs of their calves, thighs and asses made me swoon. And it wasn't just that these athletes looked fantastic in spandex; it was more the self-confidence that they had in wearing it.
The men wearing loose runner's shorts were also hot in a different way; all those bouncing cocks and balls made me horny as hell!!!
A few 20-something guys wore running tights with baggy basketball shorts over them! Too funny! "Oh, no! Someone is going to see my wee-wee!!"
But it was bittersweet as I could look but not touch .... let alone take any of those beautiful cocks into my mouth. But watching those beautiful men did the trick; I forgot about my prostate troubles for a while.
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Yes, it's a shock the first time you cum blood, but this too shall pass. Keep calm and don't let fear get the better of you. I know your past experience was bad but when Fritz had his radiation for prostate it was 100% effective and there was no pain. Know that we all wish you well!
ReplyDeleteThanks Will, for the comforting words! It's not a thing I would have blogged about normally ... but I now feel the need to tell the complete story. I'm not concerned about it because I was well briefed by my doctors as to what to expect.
DeleteSince we're grossing each other out here-- that actually happened to ME once, but I couldn't blame a prostate bioposy! It was actually in the first month or so I'd been with my partner. We were fooling around in his apartment, making out and rolling around with our clothes on, and I think he pulled my dick out through my fly and sucked me off some, and then I must have pulled his pants down and dry-humped him with just my wang hanging out like that, and things got a little rough. When I did cum, I came really hard, and I think my dick was at a weird angle jutting through my jeans, and I ejaculated blood all over him! I totally freaked, went light-headed, was in shock for a good while. It is to his credit, as the one who just had red jizz spurted all over him, that HE didn't freak out too, but just comforted me. I ran to the doctor the next day, and he checked me out, but said it just sounded like I burst a blood vessel in my dick when I came. He seemed completely unconcerned.
ReplyDeleteSex is dangerous!
I continue to wait along with you to hear the news soon that you're going to be OK. Keep us posted.
Yes, in the game of one-upsmanship, your gross-out story beats mine any day. Thanks for writing!
DeleteHang in there, sending you positive, healthy thoughts.
ReplyDeleteI am sure the waiting must be AWFUL.
Hugs, too
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