Thursday, November 6, 2014

To blog or not to blog ...

It's been over two months since I've done a proper "story" blog.  Wow!  Before this, I posted pretty much every second day for three years;   all the fear, drama and excitement of my separation, coming-out and divorce journey was laid bare in my blog.

Explorer Jack recently asked me if I missed blogging or was it a relief to be away from the burden of always having to post.   Hmmmmm.  I'm not sure!

Stepping back from the blog, I came to realize what a curious exercise writing a personal blog really is, at least the way I do it.   Isn't it really odd, revealing my thoughts, fears and the most intimate details of my life to thousands of casual readers all over the world?

Although I now have six or more people in my town whom I confide about most of these things, only readers of my blog hear every sordid detail.  lol

Did I miss blogging?  Yes, terribly!  As I continue to push beyond my comfort level regarding gay sex and relationships, I miss the opportunity to reflect on what was going on as I wrote each post. I also regret not making a blog record of my recent adventures.

Most importantly, I missed the opportunity to receive feedback, comments and invaluable advice from friends (some of whom I've met) and experienced gay men from around the world.  From a distance, my blog reader friends were able to cut through my confusion and inexperience and offer an objective perspective on my latest gay adventure.

Having said all that, it was a bit of a relief not to have to blog on every second or third day.  The problem wasn't a shortage of gay stories to write about, that's for sure.   I take a great deal of time with each post, carefully crafting the story and (as a teacher), striving for perfect organization, spelling and grammar, and then severely editing each post to condense it as much as possible.

Sometimes, I spend more time getting the perfect man pics to accompany the blog post than it took to write the post itself.

My decision:  I intend to continue my blog as before, posting every second or third day.

My problem with blogging will happen when I meet "Mr. Right"  or at least a man who MIGHT be Mr. Right.   At that point, I cannot imagine posting about a relationship which is just developing;  it would be like inviting dozens of people into an intimate twosome..... a betrayal, of sorts.

Yet, if I did embark on a dating relationship and did NOT blog about it, my blog would not be as honest account as it is now.    I would not be able to write about a huge, important part of my life and my account would be full of holes.   Hmmmmm ....... tricky!

I'll cross that bridge when I come to it!
 

10 comments:

  1. nice to have you back! now how are the kids doing on their various adventures? how is the new school/students? are you ready for winter yet?

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    Replies
    1. Thanks, Sweetie|! I'll answer all of these questions on my Saturday a.m. post!

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  2. Yeah, man, I get you, 100%!!!

    I got nuked by goggle. So I am starting over, and oh my god, did the thoughts you expressed run through my mind.

    I intend to also get back to twice a week posts. Right now, I am so busy with ROSMY, RATS/Frostfest, the Boy, work...and building a new blog from scratch on my server (Wordpress, I am learning so much so fast! God, I miss blogger, but screw them).

    Glad you're back, BB!

    Peace <3
    Jay

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey! Can you add me to your blogroll at:
      http://www.jgmurphy.org/wp?
      Thanks!
      Jay

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  3. Maybe try once a week update if you do not have time. Keep in mind you are a role model for some, those not leaving comments. I am sure by now you gave at least two men some thing to think about if they plan to get married. That story you shared sticks with me for some reason ... He called you back in bed but you said no, then you "stalked" him to see cars and toys at his place when you drove by. So go ahead, give more men something to think about. Hugs

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  4. I have found myself at a crossroads, too. While I write a different style blog, getting nuked hurt, and it took a while to figure out what came next. But I came to almost the same conclusion you did. I set up my own blog on my server, and will blog again! And I agree with you, too, on the idea of blogging about a Mr. Right. While I've written about the Boy, in general terms, he's not the Mr. Right, but our relationship is special and close. So yeah, I hear you about the intrusion. I'm glad you'll still be around. You inspire me, and I need that.

    Thanks for sticking around! And BTW, if you'd add my new blog to your blogroll, that would be dandy! http://www.jgmurphy.org/wp

    Peace <3
    Jay

    ReplyDelete
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