I understand that relaxation is very important in this situation. My regular guy and I were together for a long time, about five hours, and he'd commented that he'd never seen me so relaxed. But I'm not sure if that outward relaxation extends to being relaxed "down there."
So, with much lube, a lot of time, gentleness and caring I received about half of the length before I'd had enough. The verdict was "extremely tight."
I understand that bottoming for the first time can be a big deal, so I know it will get better. While I wouldn't describe it as "painful", it wasn't particularly comfortable and there was little pleasure involved at that moment.
I also suspect the position I was in, lying face down on the bed, might not have been the best choice.... I must look into some of the other options. I am like the "Little Engine that Could".... "I thnk I can, I think I can....", so we intend to try it again. I'm not going to give up that easily!
My final thoughts:
- I could not imagine, not in a million years, bottoming for someone who you didn't know, trust and feel a great deal of affection for.
- Hundreds of millions of people have bottomed before me; if they can do it, so can I.
- I thought of people who have been anally raped (such as those poor 10 year old boys in the shower at Penn State.) I'm horrified and sickened at the thought of the terrible abuse and pain they must have endured....
"Hundreds of millions of people have bottomed before me; if they can do it, so can I." Well said. That's my philosophy too.
ReplyDeleteI spent my whole life bottoming, with a growing belief that I was missing half the excitement and pleasure of gay sex. But I was tight, very tight and previous attempts had never worked. So, finally, I called a friend I played with every now and then, asked him to be my first successful top because he was known for his skills. He worked with fingers and lube, gave me a prostate massage and after ten to fifteen minutes said I seemed to be relaxed and ready.
ReplyDeleteI was on my back, he got into position and ever so slowly and gently began to exert a little pressure. I asked him to stop for a minute but before it was over I pushed forward and pulled him in with no pain or discomfort. It felt fantastic and everything that followed was a real revelation.
Best of luck. I know you trust him and he seems to be a really considerate man; you are genuinely interested in being penetrated, so the elements are in place for a good first time. And remember that there's no obligation to bottom if you don't begin to enjoy it once you start. It would just mean you're not a bottom and that needs to be respected.
Just take this part of your journey an inch at a time. Wait a minute, that doesn't sound quite right, or then again, maybe it does.
ReplyDeletedon't forget you can practice with a butt plug, it can help getting use to it....
ReplyDeleteMy first time we did it sideways(spooning) with one leg carried up for easy entry.I too did not feel comfortable the first time I got penetrated but it gets better.If your arse is really extremely tight as you mentioned,try the standing position where u stand with one leg on a stool or the bed.That position helps for tight arse bottoms and for those couples with big height differneces.However trust me the best position to make love is missionary position.You get a lot of eye contact,kissing non-stop and you get to see the expression your partner makes in pleasure.#bonus:with missionary position ,he can rub your male parts as he penetrate you with his hands or just his abs.When you're alone,try practicing moving your knees to you chest as far as you can so that you dont get any muscle cramps when you are having sex.My partner and I had been together for almost 5 years and we always have sex in that position.Trust me,in that position you get more intimacy.It takes a few time before you actually feel the maximum pleasure,when you do,you cant wait to have sex with your partner!
ReplyDeleteThanks for all the great advice! I'll try it ASAP.
ReplyDeletePeople forget that when they first have sex of any type it is a bungle and none too pleasant. "It gets better" videos should be made for sex, not just for troubled teens. It really gets down to practice, so I would suggest plenty of it. Poppers sometimes help for the novices. Sitting down on someone is a good 'virgin' position.
ReplyDeleteWhat are poppers?
ReplyDelete"Poppers" are drugs which are used to enhance sexual pleasure. I have not used them but am considering it, but have been with guys who've used poppers during sex.
ReplyDelete