Thursday, August 14, 2014

Self-loathing and closeted

Today's pictures have nothing to do with today's story.   Ever since since I hooked up with Hunky Tradesman,  I've decided that one of my favourite positions for a man is on his hands and knees.

I love the view of cock and balls hanging between beefy thighs and a juicy ass yearning towards my mouth. 
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For the past 18 years, I have an unmarried colleague (age 50) who is deeply closeted, but only to himself.  From his voice, mannerisms and behaviour around the male students, it is obvious to everyone that he is gay.   As they years go by, he seems to be getting gayer, more swishy and more bold (in the gay sense) all the time.

An out gay teacher at school here would not cause anyone concern, but Miss Piggy (as we unkindly call him), raises a red flag for everyone except, apparently, our administrators.  I am occasionally approached by fathers of male students who express their concern about Miss Piggy's proximity to their sons.   I suspect that as the only out gay teacher at school, they think I am an expert on all matters gay.

My response is always the same:  "I can't comment about a colleague.  If you're really concerned, then go talk to the principal."  But I always add:  "I would talk to your son about this first;  he probably knows all about it already.  I'm sure you have nothing to worry about."

Miss Piggy has an attraction to, even an infatuation with, young boys, generally in grade 10.  He has a new "pet" every year, a male student who he favours with extra attention and friendship.

The young boy always fits the same profile:  usually gay or effeminate, shorter than him, with a tight body and and usually, blonde hair and blue eyes.

My colleagues and I find his behaviour at school nauseating, as we observe him getting all touchy-feeling with the boys in the cafeteria, caressing their shoulders or mooning about their lockers.

Persistent stories circulate about him hanging around in the boys' locker room while his junior volleyball team showers after a game.   Numerous parents (mainly fathers) have re-arranged the timetables of their cute sons to avoid Miss Piggy as their teacher.

He also sends private e-mails to students (one parent showed me an example) and gives "his boys" small presents and preferential treatment while marking student work.

Out in the community, I've heard countless stories about Miss Piggy from guys I hook up with.  When I tell them where I work, they respond:  "Hey, you must know _ _ _ _    _ _ _!"   They are all extremely negative about him.

He is generally described as "a self-loathing" gay, "messed up", an "old Queen" and "selfish."  After cumming but before his partner has done so, Miss Piggy will announce: "I'm done!" and walk out the door.  Miss Piggy lives with his elderly father and can never host so (I hear) spends much late-night time at a city park, cruising for anonymous sex with creepy, older, married dudes.

I dislike Miss Piggy intensely but as we work fairly closely together,  I make sure that our interactions are supportive and professional.  Since I came out, Miss Piggy avoids me and has that look of fear in his eyes, as though I'm going to jump and down, screaming:  "You're one of us! You're one of us!"

But I hear from colleagues that Miss Piggy constantly bad-mouths me behind my back.  I'm not concerned about this at all because: (1) no one believes him and (2) just consider the source;  he's the most fucked-up, disliked person that I know. 

In recent months, Miss Piggy has messaged me many times on squirt.org but without knowing who he was talking to.  (other gay guys told me his profile name)  So awkward!

His squirt by-line is:  "Willing to pay $$$$ for young cock."  He's a teacher? Ick!

His messages to me became increasingly explicit as he pressed for a hookup and when I refused, he became needy and anxious.   Push. Push. Push.  Finally, I messaged him:  "I'm NEVER hooking up with you."  and blocked him.  

To me, Miss Piggy is a prime example of what a lifetime in the closet will do to a person;  completely fucked-up, living in fear, engaging in high-risk behaviour and damaged beyond repair.  






24 comments:

  1. The Miss Piggys of the world give gay men a bad name.

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    1. Exactly! And not only gay men; he gives the teaching profession a bad name as well and not just the LGBTQ teachers.

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  2. Looking at all the balls now my balls want attention too...

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    1. There are some beauties in this post, aren't there?

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  3. The thing about is, if he truly does want underage boys, it's a lot less about his gayness, but a serious mental issue where he, for whatever reason, can't or won't form age-appropriate relationships, and it sounds from his personality, there are some rather obvious reasons. Quite honestly, too, if there are all these rumors, then at least some part of them are true. You've observed unprofessional behavior, as have others. The touching and caressing particularly bothers me. How do the students themselves react to this? Why has no one spoken to the administration? Think how bad you will feel if he does in fact get caught with a student, and "everyone" "knew" but no one said a word. It's hard to believe that the admins haven't heard the same rumors, and I agree that steering parents to them is the right thing to do, but sometimes a tip-off from someone who sees this teacher in action every day might go a long way towards the administration taking a long look at what is actually happening, and either assisting him in correcting his unprofessional behavior, or making sure he isn't around vulnerable students. I know, I'm preaching to the choir.

    Peace <3
    Jay

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    1. I agree with what you said, but the worst part is that he is not aware of his actions. He's too fucked up!

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    2. Oh he knows. They all know. He's grooming. And one of these days, one of the boys will give in. If he wasn't, he'd be hanging all over Buddy Bear, instead of the 14-15 year olds.
      Jay

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    3. The touching and caressing of male students is a compulsion which he cannot stop, made worse by the fact that he is closeted and has no significant other or bf to touch regularly.

      The boys just sit there and take the shoulder massages, perhaps with a smirk or raised eyebrow. (Their lack of reaction always surprises me)

      I'm sure the boys discuss thoroughly when they are out of earshot of teachers but no student or parent has ever made a direct complaint to the principal, as far as we know.

      One issue is that Miss Piggy is "Mr. Everything" at the school; he runs Students Council, the semi-formal dance, coordinates the graduation ceremony and Achievement Night and coaches numerous sports teams.

      Parents and students are (I suspect) afraid of the repercussions if they reported him. Our teachers' union is very powerful so we teachers cannot speak out about a fellow union colleague without serious consequences.

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    4. To add to your second comments, Rick and Jay:
      Yes, he knows exactly what he's doing! He's blondish, blue-eyed with a nice smile He's quite chubby but he's certainly attractive enough.

      Miss Piggy can be very charming and friendly to the boys so I'm sure he would have no difficulty in getting an under-aged male student in his bed whenever he wanted to.

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  4. I've seen this before and this will never end. Only this one sounds like a walking time bomb. Never say anything negative about him to anyone, nothing.
    Let him blow himself up alone, without you, and then he will be out of the way.
    This man is the worst example of fucked up as he does not know what to do, he has such mixed emotion all the time, I'm sure you can see and the lowest of self esteem.
    Can you notice how bad his energy is when near him? I would.
    Just be business like with him and be done! Everyone knows what's he's like so do not add to it with comments.
    Give yourself thanks for the support you are getting! I am amazed still compared to when you first came out as I have been there too.

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    1. In September, I will be teaching in a school on the far opposite end of town from Miss Piggy, so I will rarely (or never) see him.

      But I agree, he has extremely low self-esteem and will likely, in the end, "blow himself up alone" and get caught in a compromising situation.

      Thank you for your kind words and support.

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    2. Oh wonderful! I thought this was something you are going to. Whew!

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  5. It would have been interesting to see his reaction if you had agreed to meet him.

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    1. Miss Piggy would react with complete shock and horror, that's for sure! But I would never have broken my squirt anonymity to him because I have a great many bare-assed and bare-torsoed pic of me on my profile. I could never trust him, if he knew that these pics existed.

      I did toy with the idea by messaging him by name: "_ _ _ _ _, I will never hook up with you" and then delete my squirt profile. He would have shit a brick.

      But that would have pretty mean. Also, I would have lost contact with all my buddies on squirt.

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  6. This guy is toxic, as you are well aware. Given the behavior you describe I'm actually surprised that there haven't been complaints and some notice taken by school administrators. I remember when I went to college, fresh out of the Catholic school system and very green, it was the early 60s and suppression of gays was extremely strong. There were lots of his type then, my first real experience of gay men. I realized that societal pressures made life hell for these guys -- there was a huge incidence of alcoholism, heavy, constant smoking, drug use, all kinds of acting out. As a 17 year old who was first becoming aware of my own identity, it was very scary. But life is different now and while I can feel compassion for him on one level because it can't be pleasant to be inside his skin, he just doesn't fit into modern life and his behavior toward students is unacceptable.

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    1. Yes, Miss Piggy behaves as though he is living in a previous generation when a teacher's gayness needed to be hidden. As a never-married, childless man, there would be NO risk at all to him in coming out. Our school division (and school, community, employer, administrators, colleagues) are the most gay-friendly, gay-supportive and gay-proactive than almost anywhere else that I know of.

      By the way, Miss Piggy is a heavy drinker and got falling-down drunk on a school trip to Europe when he was supposed to be supervising students.

      Our teachers' union is quite powerful, so unless he is actually caught giving a boy a blowjob, the administrators can't or won't do anything.

      For most of the the past 18 years, our now-retired principal was (I sensed) well aware of Miss Piggy's inclination and worked to protect him and / or moderate his gay behaviour. I never understood their relationship but we always wondered if this retired principal was closeted himself. and kept Miss Piggy out of trouble as "one of the family." Our new principal is not aware of all of this history.

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  7. I wonder just how long, if at all, his behavior would have been tolerated if his actions were directed towards female students. That thought confesses me because who would think that parents would be more likely to take action against inappropriate heterosexual actions vs. homosexual but that's the vibe I get.

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    1. Excellent point! If a 50 year old male teacher was caressing and otherwise being "friendly" towards a 15 year old female student, he would be dealt with immediately.

      The young girl would be seen as a victim, much more so than a male student would be.

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  8. So that's what I have to look forward to?

    On a more serious note, the instructor in me is really squicked out by the power imbalances here. Underaged or not, teachers should not be having relationships with their students (as you well know, and have written about in the past).

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  9. The vast majority of teachers are mature, not needy and emotional and mentally stable. They know how to navigate professional boundaries with students, which starts with NOT having personal relationships with them.

    Miss Piggy is messed up, self-centred, socially immature, needy and has no relationship experience. He just doesn't get it!

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  10. As a mother of teenage boys I'm creeped out by this. And more so by the fact that everybody knows and nobody acts. Even the other teachers. Because while most of the teenage boys might just shrug and laugh about it, there will be some who act casually but will feel very uncomfortable about it. Imagine these were girls, everybody would have been in a twist about it. Boys are supposed to be treated with the same care, sorry.
    I remember how disturbed I had been as a girl when I had had a teacher who just hadn't respected our personal space. Poor boys...

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    1. I agree with you completely! Ours must be a pretty fucked-up system because everyone seems to know about this going on for at least the past twenty years. Even teachers in every other high school in our division ask me about Miss Piggy.

      Everyone "knows" but unless an actual incident occurs, no one will act.

      Teachers won't report him because of union rules and a "none of my business" attitude, the boys are afraid to report their suspicions for fear of being labelled "gay", parents lack the courage or they fear repercussions and the principals are too busy / too clueless and generally out of touch with what is actually happening in their schools.

      My ex-wife made it clear (and I supported her) that if there ever was a whiff of an attraction involving Miss Piggy towards our son, the shit would have hit the fan. She alone would have had to courage to report directly to everyone, such as the police, our Director of Education (her friend) and the provincial teachers' regulating body. But Miss Piggy, wisely, left our son alone.

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