Reflections on my Big Gay Adventure

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I'm  in an airport lounge, half-way done my nearly eight hours of travel to the Great White North. My home town might as well be on another planet ... it is so different than what I've experienced over the past week.

I announced the start of my Big Gay Adventure with much trepidation in an earlier post.  In the end, my week far exceeded my expectations.  Much of the time, I found it took a great deal of courage to force myself into these scary and unfamiliar situations.  I don't regret any of it!

Something that has troubled me deeply for a long time was this:  I never really knew what my sexual response to other men "in the flesh" would be.  Was I only attracted to the abstract images online?  This week's experiences in the strip club and in bed with two different guys proved to me that:  (1) Yes, I can get extremely sexually aroused by men in real life and (2) Yes, Virginia, I really am gay.   It may have been obvious to all of you, but it certainly wasn't to me!

Some gay highlights of my week:

• Spend a day with my dear friends Cubby and Greg;  that will be the highlight of my year, not just week!
• Strolled Buffalo's gay village and went to my first gay bar where I enjoyed a little bit of attention as well as fantastic conversation with C & G.
• Visited two male strip clubs and enjoyed looking at the sweet, sexy guys, enormously.   The high points were the few times when a fully nekkid stripper got an erection on stage....  it drove me wild with desire!
• Loved having the hottie stripper boys just sit close to me not to mention being fondled by them.  Sweet!
• The second strip club was very much a "cruis-ey" place and I saw first-hand how a little eye contact, a smile, some flirtation and a bit of an outgoing personality could get you everywhere.  (I was too exhausted to pursue any of this but I now know what I could do.)
  



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• Had my first (and probably last) paid nekkid lap dance.
• Looked around some gay sex shops:  I loved the leather gear... the monster dildos, not so much.
• Spend enough time walking around Toronto's gay village so that I became quite comfortable there
• Signed up on a free online gay dating site;  I got the biggest response from guys in the 27 to 31 age group. Why???
• Had the most incredible sensual and sexual experience of my entire life, being made love to by a sexy, energetic, aggressive 28 year old who not only drove two hours to pick me up / drive me home but cooked and served me supper afterwards!   Not a typical first-time hookup!!!
• Discovered I loved being kissed by a man.
• Had a second hookup with a guy stoned out of his mind in the seediest basement apartment imaginable.  On the plus side, he had a monster cock which in fact, was a little too big for me for oral, although I managed just fine.
• Was on the receiving end of some amazing, convulsion-inducing deep throat action, although I never came.  Unreal!
• Discovered that I am (I think) good at giving blow jobs and boy, do I like doing it!!!  Much more practice is needed, however. 
  

Sexy Lawn Boys

He'd be perfect with some
chest hair and a treasure trail!

My work-related training is in full swing and man, is it intense!  Yesterday, we had activities for +14 hours.  The subject is highly technical and extremely difficult.  One of our trainers is a leading expert in the world on the subject.

There are forty of us from all over Canada and with about 30% from overseas;  from Australia, Singapore, South Africa,  a couple from the USA and various European countries.  The majority are men; most of them attractive and a couple are just irresistible.  A  few of my fellow trainees and / or instructors are gay and I suspect that there are one or two who may be married and in the closet.

With that in mind, today I plan to wear either a rainbow belt (the suitcase strap from the previous post) or a rainbow bracelet.  It pays to advertise!

I know that y'all what to hear about my gay village adventures, but I am too exhausted and to pressed for time to do a proper post.  I promise that you'll hear all the details when I have some time.  So ........... in the meantime, here's a post which I prepared earlier.

Although I won't be getting back to Toronto, I hope that I'm not yet done with my gay adventures.  I have several options which I am working on but I don't want to post about them so as not to put unnecessary pressure on myself.

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The college-aged lawn boys and landscapers are out in full force in my town, providing lots of delightful eye-candy.  Most of them are slim, lightly muscled with fuzzy legs, scruffy unshaven faces and touseled hair.  They are all wearing cargo shorts and are either shirtless or wearing a tight Tee or a wife-beater singlet.

They all look so darn cute... just irresistible!  As I drive by, I repeat to myself, "I am hot attracted to guys the same as as my own kids.... I am hot attracted to guys the same as as my own kids....."  One day, I might even believe that.

How about a Meme?

To start, how about a meme from Michael at Spo-Reflections? 

2010 Accomplishment
Despite my wife's discovery of my bi/gay sexuality in December 2009 and the ensuing drama that followed, we both continued to do a fantastic job as parents and managed to maintain an exceptionally stable, loving environment for our three children.  We are still trying to find our way; unsure what our future will look like.


2010 Discovery

Medina at Tetouan, Morocco

Like millions before me, I "discovered" Julia Child, first by the movie Julie and Julia, then her cookbooks, autobiography and then the reissued DVDs of her 1960s cooking show.  She was just fantastic!  I now understand why everyone loved her so.  Now, I'm cooking my way through her TV series "The French Chef."

Favorite 2010 Vacation/Holiday
Traveled in Spain from Madrid, Sevilla, Granada then crossed the Mediterranian to Morocco where we spent a day in a fantastic, ancient Medina of Tétouan, a UNESCO World Heritage Site.


Best dining in 2010

2010 Regret
I honestly can't think of any regrets.  I generally am a sunny, positive, calm person who has a very clear view of what really matters in life, given the cards you have been dealt.  I rarely allow myself to have "regrets" involving looking back at ancient history;  worrying about things you cannot change.  Second thoughts:  I regret the pain and distress that the discovery of my sexuality has caused my wife.    

Magic Moment in 2010.
 Every part of the Spain / Morocco trip was a magic moment, especially the food!!.... paella, sangria and infinite variety of tapas....on and on.


What states did you visit in 2010?
Minnesota, Nova Scotia, Spain and Morocco 

The 2010 Surprises

-the discovery that I am really great in a crisis.  I assisted in two serious medical emergencies until medical assistance arrived, one at my workplace and one involving anaphylaxis on the plane returning from Spain, in mid-Atlantic.  


Three 2011 Goals
-continue to provide a stable, nurturing environment for my children

In Tetouan, Morocco, deep in the heart of the medina, we had a fantastic supper in the most incredible eatery....  the room had whitewashed stone walls inlaid with colourful tiles and hung with tapestries and brass lamps.  Musicians played unfamiliar Arabic instruments and an Arabic dancer  twirled a brass tray with candles balanced on his head.  No women were working there.  The dancer was a wrinkled 70ish little man in red silk harem pants!   Here's what I can remember about the meal.

Moroccan waiter and dancer.

• A soup containing Moroccan spices, lentils (?) and vegetables.

• Couscous (Moroccan-spiced semolina cooked with vegetables and some type of meat)

• Tajine (a rich, spicy stew, with chicken, onions, tomato, almonds, herbs, dried fruit).

• Mint tea: strong green tea mixed with dried mint and a lot of sugar.  Everyone's favourite!

• Dessert was some very sweet honey and almond pastries of some sort.

-with my wife, try to clarify our status and our future.  Right now, we're in a bit of a DADT mode