THE WAR ON CHRISTMAS 2013

The explicit gay e-mail which I received on my school account has consumed most of my thoughts this week.  After much online detective work, I am 95% sure who sent the e-mail.  It was NOT a malicious homophobic taunt from a goofy straight boy.

Instead, it was a serious proposition for sex from a gay student in my grade 11 class who has a serious crush on me.

He recently celebrated his 18th birthday so he decided that he was legal enough to make his move!  Could you blame him?  How could the poor boy control himself?  lol

The naked, hard-cocked picture attached to the e-mail was of the student himself.   Awkward!  But I'll blog about this fully on Sunday. 

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Here's another one of Sean's Too Much Information questions which I look forward to answering each week. Sean's blog is Just a Jeep Guy.

1. Which religion or faith do you belong to, if any?  I was baptised a Lutheran but didn't attend a single church service in the following three decades.  Not one!  My parents were not church-goers and were, at times, disgusted with the hypocrites who attended church regularly but cheated, stole and lied in their personal lives.

But under my wife's influence, we were married in the Lutheran church and our three kids were baptised there.  But we haven't attended service for 17 years.  I got tired of being told, week after week, that we were a bunch of dirty sinners and that we would rot in hell.  The Lutherans are almost as bad as the Catholics!

2. What is your opinion of Merry Christmas vs. Happy Holidays?  Merry Christmas works for me! 

3. Holiday music on the radio? When and how much?  I don't mind hearing Christmas music throughout December in small doses. But Feliz Navidad as sung by Jose Feliciano makes me nauseous.

4. When do you start decorating? Do you?   I decorate the indoor tree in early December and keep the outdoor lights on the trees year-round, but only start to light them in early November, just to stave off the darkness.

5. White lights or multi colored? Multi-coloured all the way!  We need a dash of colour in this monochromatic winter landscape.

6. Gift cards, cash or actually shopped-for presents?   I take great care in purchasing very thoughtful presents for the special people in my life, especially for my future Mr. Right.  But the kids sometimes do appreciate cash go towards the purchase of some large item.   So, I'd say..... all of the above.

7. Christmas cards and or family update letters are... things I never send and rarely receive.  But I do send one Christmas card to my elderly, sweet ex-mother-in-law who is so supportive of her gay ex-son-in-law.

8. Snow is... fantastic!  I love snow.  When I lived in Vancouver for two years, the lack of snow was one of the biggest things I missed.  I love most winter sports involving snow as long as the temperatures aren't too frigid.

9. Have you been a good little boy or girl this year?  Yes, at heart, I'm a very good person. I just know it!  Even with the random guys I hook up with, I am highly respectful of them, physically, emotionally and with respect to their privacy.

10. RAPID FIRE CHRISTMAS FAVORITES:
     1. Food:  my mother's turkey stuffing, gravy and mashed potatoes. I often eat only a tiny piece of the turkey itself.
     2. Desserts:  my mother's blueberry cheesecake, made with intensely-flavoured wild blueberries which we pick ourselves in the Canadian north woods.
     3. Drink:  home-made egg nog (a very rare treat) made with rum, Grand Marnier, raw eggs, whipping cream, nutmeg. orange rind and milk.
     4. Holiday movie:  Miracle on 34th Street;  the modern one with Dylan McDermott.
     5. Holiday music:  The Huron Carol has been my #1 favourite from my earliest memory.  It reminds me of the Canadian north woods in winter. Haunting! Click on the photo link above, to hear it.
6. Holiday tradition: Christmas dinner at my parents' with my kids.  This is so much more enjoyable now that my ex-wife is not there!  It was tense because she didn't get along with any of my family and I could never quite trust her to behave appropriately.

I imagine that everyone would have expected me to say instead: "Opening the presents on Christmas morning when the kids were young", but my wife's bossiness and anger ensured that it was a tense and stressful affair.  Now, the kids spend Christmas morning at my ex's house and Christmas dinner with me at my parents'.

BONUS:   Christmas sex: What have you done under the mistletoe? Have you caught daddy kissing Santa Clause? Have you done it a santa suit? Did you come down the chimney? Just how merry have you made Santa's helpers?

I've done NONE of these things! I'm so boring!  But given opportunity, there's very little which I would say "no" to.

Dilemma: an obscene gay e-mail

Good news about my car which my daughter put into the ditch on Sunday!  Many pounds of frozen mud and ice were melted from the front end and it was discovered that there was no damage.  This means a $50 repair bill instead of $500.  Woo-hoo!!

Late last night, I received the following e-mail to my school account:

Subject:  period 4 math questions
Hello Mr. _ _ _ _ _ _ .....  please fuck me in the ass and cum in it. Breeding is fun.

Of Age ;)

Two pictures were attached of a full-frontal, naked fat guy, probably someone older than a teenager.  Clearly, the sender knew me fairly well;  my teaching schedule and my frequently-mispelled last name were correct.  I would also speculate that the sender is probably questioning his own sexuality.

Cyberbullying of teachers, especially on a gay theme, is not unusual.  Teachers have been victimized the world over with their pictures photoshopped and widely distributed and fake profiles set up on various gay sites.

I've had my face photoshopped countless times and a fake classroom website set up which pretended to be in my name, but these were done by students who were supportive and in fact, infatuated with me. And the photoshoppers proudly showed me the modified pictures of me;  all in good fun! 

But this was my first obscene e-mail!   I was (and am) amused by it, just imagining how much fun the giggling, goofy boy(s) got out of sending it.  In my subject area, I teach mainly goofy boys.

But then my feelings became more conflicted as I considered the bigger picture. 

1. I don't like the idea of naked imagines on my my school e-mail account.  If I had SENT such pictures from my school e-mail, I would face severe consequences from my employer and from the provincial body regulating teachers.
2. I was concerned and annoyed that students would be so lacking in judgement as to send such an inappropriate e-mail to a professional in his work environment.  Did they really think that I wouldn't report it?  

Recently, a student from my school tea-bagged a drunk student from a rival school at a party. Other students posted the picture of the drunk young man with balls hanging in his face.  Eventually, school authorities and the police found out and the consequences were severe!
3. I wondered how "out" I really am at school.  Did the student who sent this really think that I am still in the closet?  I wouldn't want them to think that was afraid to report this for fear of outing myself.
   
   I came out to many close colleagues three years ago and from what I've heard since, I think every teacher in my school now knows as well as colleagues from other schools in our division.  
4. I've never openly discussed my gayness with students but frankly, it should be obvious to all but the most clueless among them just from my voice alone.  I'm also very "gay-supportive" in my comments in class!  As well, many, many students saw me when I attended our Pride events last June. 
5. I wouldn't want these obscene, gay e-mails to become a regular occurrence.
6.  My last thought:  if they are sending such e-mails to someone in a position of relative power, they might also be sending similar ones to some little gay kids who who don't have the resources or confidence to combat cyberbullying.   Ignoring it just sends out the message that this behaviour is acceptable.

What to do, what to do?

To start, I forwarded the e-mail to our teachers' union president for advice;  a fantastic, dynamic younger man who is highly supportive of me and my gayness.

I'll hear from him in a few hours but I'm sure he will tell me to report it to my principal.   My principal is a .... how to put this tactfully.... a useless tit ....  a wet dishrag..... so I don't expect too much effective action. But at this stage, it would be extremely unwise for me to go over his head and report this to the Superintendent.

I would like our division network administrators to be informed so they could examine the e-mail more closely, although I doubt they can track its sender.  I assume that the police would have more resources to deal with this but one e-mail does not constitute cyberbullying, I think.

Thoughts?

A beautiful fat cock

Hottie looked EXACTLY like him, except older.

I had such high hopes of getting much work done on Sunday!   I had so much to do such as:

• marking several sets of unmarked tests 
• writing a reference for a graduating student
• writing a student teacher evaluation
• framing, insulating, wiring, installing vapour barrier and sheet rock on the remaining living room wall
• baking cookies for a gift basket to be raffled off in support of our school Breakfast Club
• attempting to get the house in order for Christmas

Instead, I got none of these projects done. None!  Here's now my day went down:

Sunday morning was a "brisk" -25 C at 7:00 a.m. when my daughter's car wouldn't start or even boost.  Since she needed to get to her early morning cook's job, I loaned her mine.  Fifty feet down the road, here's what happened to my car!  Due to a combination of an icy unsanded road, no winter tires and driver inattention, my car ended up in a deep water-filled ditch, mired in mud and ice!  Grrrr.....

Most of them morning was spent pulling it out with my father's four wheel drive truck and just as the job was nearly done, I got a text from Hottie Construction Worker:  he had just three hours to play but it had to be at my house!  Woo-hoo!!

A quick shower later and I was driving down the highway, horny as hell, when I had to turn back because of a terrible vibration in my car's front end at any speed higher than 40 km/hr.  Fu-u-u-ck!   Shit! Shit!

My son was heading out for his KFC job, so with much effort, we boosted my daughter's car and off I went again.  Her car is an old rattle-trap with a barely-functioning, noisy transmission and by the time I got to town, I realized that (a) I was 1.5 hours late (b)  the gas tank was 100% empty and (c) I'd forgotten my credit cards and drivers' license. 

I texted to cancel Hottie Construction Worker;  there was no time for me to bring him back to my house and his "old lady"  (a girlfriend) had his car.   Most unusually, he invited me in to their apartment for our playtime.  "She won't be back until 4:00."

I'm never comfortable hooking up in a home where a wife / girlfriend actually lives, but what the heck, I deserved my tasty cock treat after all the difficulties I'd overcome in getting there.

It was the sweetest possible outcome!  Hottie Construction Worker still doesn't kiss men (but I'm wearing him down on that one!) but more than makes up for it in his passion for sucking cock, the best I've ever encountered.

I've already blogged about him before:  38 years old, my height, super lean, lightly muscled, tattooed, nipple-pierced and with sinewy, lightly-furred torso.  And he has the most magnificent, fattest, hardest, most responsive uncut cock I've ever met, with the bonus of some big balls hanging beneath.  And he's the sweetest guy ever who really, really wants to be with me, when our work schedules allow.

But after an hour of sweetness, I had to leap up, borrow $5:00 for gasoline from Hottie, pick my daughter up and drive her home and then drive my disabled car back to town to the repair shop ( this took over an hour, driving at 30 km/hr) and then wait for my son to pick me up at 7:00 pm from his KFC shift.

What a busy twelve hours!  Whew!

Another, younger version of Hottie.  I loved his thighs and lean torso!

Hot men cooking

This post is decorated with some sexy pics from Hot Men and Food.
 
Boot Fetish Student Teacher has taken to texting me many times each day, sometimes to ask for teaching advice and often, just to flirt.  We've said "hello" a few times at school;  he's very sweet and quite awkward but is getting more brave is seeking out contact with me, however fleeting.

Early Friday morning, he unexpectedly showed up to volunteer at our school Breakfast Club.  I was the teacher in charge and I had mentioned earlier in the week (in a text) that I would be there.  When he walked in, I smiled and thought, "Oh, my!"

My inner-city school has a large population of students who come from difficult situations;  broken homes, criminal activity, poverty, substance abuse, physical abuse and neglect are commonplace.

We also have numerous young students from isolet communities (no road access) in the far North who leave their families behind to live in poorly-supervised boarding houses.  Some of our students come to school without having eaten breakfast and go all day without access to food.

The teachers and support staff have operate a breakfast programme to help these kids .  We get minimal funding which is supplemented by school fundraising, volunteer labour and by teachers contributing their own food to the cause.

Every weekday, a teacher (or two) and many student volunteers show up 1.5 hours early to prepare a hundred or more small servings of one different offering each day;  muffins, scrambled egg wraps, yogurt-and-fruit parfaits and even pizza.

Due to the stigma of poverty, even the hungriest of teenagers would never come to a specific room for a "free breakfast."

To overcome this, all the food is loaded onto several carts and precisely at 9:15 a.m, student volunteers circulate around the school hallways and students freely help themselves.  The food just disappears!!!

As I mentioned in my Kiss the Cook post, I love to cook, so I really enjoy the challenges of cooking for our Breakfast Club. The offerings must be:

• extremely cheap
• peanut allergen-free
• in compliance with the "Healthy Food in Schools" legislation
• easily prepared by unskilled teenaged cooks in very little time
• mainly items which can be eaten from a paper napkin 
• and of course, absolutely delicious.... something will delight our teenaged eaters

Each weekday is covered by a different teacher (or pair of teachers) and we compete in coming up with inventive, affordable workable food ideas and offer each other constant support and encouragement.  It's so much fun!

After Friday's Breakfast Club, I received a text from the Boot Fetish Student Teacher:

maybe I'll help out next time you're cooking haha ;-)  i sucked at wrapping those burritos this morning.  fail!

I think he wants me.  :-)

TMI QUESTIONS: KISS THE COOK!

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Tom Daley

It's been a drama-filled week, all of it centred around my ex.  And although I've tried by best to avoid it, I've  been sucked right into it. Looking back, I can't imagine how I survived so many years of hatred and erratic behaviour. Exhausting!

But I would like to join every gay blogger in the world in congratulating Tom Daley on his courageous coming out.  I say "courageous" because in just 16 hours, his youtube clip had over three million page views.

My own coming-out to my children and then my parents was one of the most nerve-wracking things I'd ever done but it involved a total of five people!  I came out nearly three years ago, but that seems like an eternity ago.

I smiled during the first part of the clip because he was so sweet and hesitant but as his conversation with the world progressed, I found myself getting a bit misty-eyed.  I like how he didn't label himself as 'bi' or 'gay', just that "I met someone .... and that someone is a guy." 

When I met someone and they made me feel so happy, so safe and everything just feels…great.   Well that someone is a guy, and it did take me by surprise a little bit.” - Tom Daley

His last comment resonated strongly with me except I was more than a "little bit" surprised.  I truly didn't believe I was 100% gay until my first hookup with a man.  I wasn't prepared for the intensity of my gayness once I allowed the denial to drop away.

World AIDS Day

Click on this World AIDS Day link to get informed and find out how to be tested.  I've never been tested for HIV or any other STD /  STI and feel horribly guilty about my cowardice.

But in the meantime, here are some pics of hotties from the  Red Speedo Blog to mark the occasion.

I've had a stressful weekend involving the latest drama with my ex-wife.  I suddenly became angry, mainly at myself, for still being afraid of her and for still having to deal with this bullshit, four years after coming out to her.

So I blasted her via text messaging and she backed down.   There's much more to this on-going drama but right now, I don't feel like thinking about it, much less blogging the story.   So here are some random thoughts for Sunday morning.

1.  Our local AIDS organization had a breakfast on Friday to mark World AIDS Day.  I purchased a ticket and was looking forward to attending.  Major "gay" events are few and far between in my town and I intend to support all of them.

Also, I wanted to show my face publicly as one of the few out teachers in town.  Everyone of importance in town would be there;  the mayor, school officials and all the local politicians.

As well, I would meet LGBTQ people I know and possibility some new ones and perhaps seek out some volunteer opportunities.

But my son was having mechanical difficulties with his truck and by the time we got them sorted out, I missed the breakfast and was nearly late to my own class!  :-)    Next year!

2.  My oldest daughter is here for the week which I deeply appreciate.  She's very diligent in dividing her time between her parents' homes although I know in the off-season, she really would prefer to remain in town.  It's pretty bleak out here in the winter and it's a much shorter drive to all her friends' homes as well as her school and work.

I really admire her work ethic.  At 21, she's fully self-funding (although she lives rent-free with her parents), attending culinary school full-time AND cooking at local fresh-food restaurant for three six-hour shifts per week.  I'm very proud of all my kids! 

3.  I got to spend the night snuggled up with my own little dog, as usual, and my son's dog who likes to sleep with her wet nose pressed up against my cheek or neck.  Sweet!  But it would be so much sweeter to have a sexy man's lips pressed up against me all night.

My son works full 8 hour shifts at KFC most weekend days as well as the odd weekday shift.  Apparently, due to staff turn-over, he's one of the main cooks there... "the reliable one."  His sisters and I still cannot picture him standing over deep-fryer all day, handling raw chicken and cleaning out the grease traps.  Too funny!

Most weekend nights, my son sleeps over in town at friends' houses;  I usually send some food with him such as a pan of lasagna or some unbaked, homemade pizzas so he's not always being a freeloader.  He hasn't had friends over here for a long time, maybe because (1) the house is under construction and (2) all his friends attend my school and some are my students which would be a bit awkward.

I hope that the fact that I'm gay isn't the reason that he doesn't bring his friends over .... that's another bridge we might have to cross, but not right now.