To blog or not to blog ...

It's been over two months since I've done a proper "story" blog.  Wow!  Before this, I posted pretty much every second day for three years;   all the fear, drama and excitement of my separation, coming-out and divorce journey was laid bare in my blog.

Explorer Jack recently asked me if I missed blogging or was it a relief to be away from the burden of always having to post.   Hmmmmm.  I'm not sure!

Stepping back from the blog, I came to realize what a curious exercise writing a personal blog really is, at least the way I do it.   Isn't it really odd, revealing my thoughts, fears and the most intimate details of my life to thousands of casual readers all over the world?

Although I now have six or more people in my town whom I confide about most of these things, only readers of my blog hear every sordid detail.  lol

Did I miss blogging?  Yes, terribly!  As I continue to push beyond my comfort level regarding gay sex and relationships, I miss the opportunity to reflect on what was going on as I wrote each post. I also regret not making a blog record of my recent adventures.

Most importantly, I missed the opportunity to receive feedback, comments and invaluable advice from friends (some of whom I've met) and experienced gay men from around the world.  From a distance, my blog reader friends were able to cut through my confusion and inexperience and offer an objective perspective on my latest gay adventure.

Having said all that, it was a bit of a relief not to have to blog on every second or third day.  The problem wasn't a shortage of gay stories to write about, that's for sure.   I take a great deal of time with each post, carefully crafting the story and (as a teacher), striving for perfect organization, spelling and grammar, and then severely editing each post to condense it as much as possible.

Sometimes, I spend more time getting the perfect man pics to accompany the blog post than it took to write the post itself.

My decision:  I intend to continue my blog as before, posting every second or third day.

My problem with blogging will happen when I meet "Mr. Right"  or at least a man who MIGHT be Mr. Right.   At that point, I cannot imagine posting about a relationship which is just developing;  it would be like inviting dozens of people into an intimate twosome..... a betrayal, of sorts.

Yet, if I did embark on a dating relationship and did NOT blog about it, my blog would not be as honest account as it is now.    I would not be able to write about a huge, important part of my life and my account would be full of holes.   Hmmmmm ....... tricky!

I'll cross that bridge when I come to it!